JOSHUA: Chapter 9

Chapter 9
Summary:	The kings west of the Jordan River heard of Joshua's conquests (the kings of the Hittites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites) and banded themselves together, forming an alliance to battle together against Joshua and the Israelites. However, when the Gibeonites heard about the massacres at Jericho and Ai, they devised a plan to disguise themselves as ambassadors from a far away land, carrying old worn sacks upon their donkeys, weathered and repaired wine bottles, worn-out shoes upon their feet, tattered clothes, and they made sure that the food they carried with them was dry and moldy. They approached Joshua at his campsite in Gilgal, telling him that they were from a far away country, and asked Joshua to make a treaty with them. The Israelites asked the Hivites how could they be sure that they didn't live close by and therefore why should they make a treaty with them. They answered to Joshua that they were his servants. Joshua asked them who they were and where they came from, to which they replied that they had come from a far away country to be servants to the Israelites, stating that they had heard of God's fame, and all that he did in Egypt, in addition to what he did to King Sihon and to King Og. They said, "Our leaders and the people of our country told us to stock up with provisions for our long journey to meet you, and tell you that we are your servants and would like to make peace with you. This bread we took with us was fresh from our houses on the day we began our journey, but it has now become dry and moldy; these bottles of wine which we filled were new, and now are beginning to crack; and our clothes and shoes have become worn after our long journey." The Israelites inspected their provisions, but didn't consult God about them, so Joshua made peace with them, allowing them to live, and the leaders of the congregation swore an oath to uphold their treaty. Three days later, however, the Israelites discovered that the people they had just sworn an oath to instead lived amongst them. The Israelites on a journey, discovered on the third day the cities of Gibeon, Chephirah, Beeroth, and Kirjathjearim. However, the Israelites didn't massacre them since the leaders of the congregation had sworn to uphold peace with them by in the name of the God of Israel. The Israelites voiced their displeasure towards their leaders, but the leaders replied, "We have sworn to them by the Lord God of Israel, therefore we may not touch them. We will let them live due to the oath we swore, however, let them fetch our lumber and draw water for the congregation." Joshua summoned the Gibeonites and said to them, "Why did you deceive us, telling us that you were from a far away land when instead you dwell among us? Therefore we shall curse you, and none of you shall be free from being our slaves, cutting our wood and drawing our water for the house of my God." The Gibeonites answered Joshua, saying, "Your servants were told how the Lord your God had commanded his servant Moses to give you this land and to destroy its inhabitants from before you. We feared for our lives because of you, and we are now in your hands. Do whatever you see as good and right for you to do to us." And so Joshua prevented the Israelites from slaughtering them, and instead made them permanent slaves, cutting wood and drawing water for the congregation, and for God's altar in the place where he would choose.
Thoughts:	When you hear biblical apologists try and justify horrific genocides such as those we've covered in previous chapters (Jericho and Ai, in addition to the slaughter of the Midianites, in which Moses ordered the non-combatant women and children to be slaughtered - except for the virgin girls, which the soldiers could "keep for themselves") an oft repeated rationalization is that genocide is somehow a better fate than slavery. After discussing Numbers: Chapter 31 which details the slaughter of the Midianites, we heard this exact apologetic used to defend the chapter by apologeticspress.org (that I also gave a detailed rebuttal to): "Complaining about Jehovah’s order to destroy innocent children is a vain gesture when one realizes that the children were spared an even worse fate of being reared as slaves under the domination of sin." The flaw in this apologetic is that it makes assumptions on behalf of the people faced with either a violent death or a life of enslavement. While the apologist might attempt to explain away that it boils down to a matter of "historical context", explaining away that people in the days of Moses's and Joshua's lifetimes would rather opt for the dignity of death than the indignity of slavery, the Gibeonites from this chapter dispel the likelihood of that notion. The Gibeonites in this chapter clearly demonstrate that they value their self preservation more than they do their freedom. It's arrogant to claim that slavery is a worse fate than death when you're not the one facing such options, and that in light of the "historical context" excuse, there are those who have clearly demonstrated that they're willing to face any punishment, including slavery, to preserve their lives: 9:23 "Now therefore ye are cursed, and there shall none of you be freed from being bondmen, and hewers of wood and drawers of water for the house of my God." 9:24-25 "And they answered Joshua, and said...And now, behold, we are in thine hand: as it seemeth good and right unto thee to do unto us, do." It's interesting to point out the parallels between the stories of Rahab the harlot to the Gibeonites and how drastically they're intended to be perceived. God expressly forbids the Israelites from making any covenant with nor are they show any mercy towards the inhabitants of the "promised land" - a commandment that the Israelites violate in both cases toward Rahab and toward the Gibeonites. Both Rahab and the Gibeonites have heard of and believe the tales of God's covenant with Moses Both Rahab and the Gibeonites were motivated by self preservation. Rahab begged for the lives of her family to be spared, while the Gibeonites resigned themselves to their entire tribe becoming enslaved. Both Rahab and the Gibeonites used deception in order to procure their self preservation. The sparing of both Rahab and the Gibeonites against God's commandments served to benefit the Israelites. The sparing of Rahab and her family was a "reward" for betraying her own people and covering the tracks of the two spies Joshua sent to her city, and the sparing of the Gibeonites provided the Israelites with slave labor. Although the Gibeonites trick the Israelites into sparing their lives by swearing to uphold a treaty under false pretenses, the chapter briefly mentions but fails to address why, Joshua didn't consult God to see through the ruse. It also doesn't address any culpability on behalf of Joshua, or the Israelites as a whole, for their failure to do so.

DEUTERONOMY: Chapter 21

Chapter 21
Summary:	Moses' speech continues: "If a man is found slain in the land which the Lord your God has given you to possess, his body lying in the field, and it is not known who has slain him, then the elders and judges shall measure from the body to the nearest city. The elders of that city shall take a heifer that has never been yoked or worked in a field, and bring the animal down into a valley with running water that is neither plowed or sown, and they shall break the heifer's neck there in the valley. "The priests and the Levites shall arrive - for they are chosen by the Lord your God to minister to him, bless in the name of the Lord, and to act as judges for the people - and the elders of that city that are beside the dead man's body, shall wash their hands over the heifer that has been beheaded in the valley. They shall say, 'Our hands have not shed this blood, neither have our eyes seen it. Be merciful, O Lord, unto the people of Israel, whom you have redeemed, and not judge them responsible for this innocent blood.' So shall this absolve the people of Israel from the guilt of the death of an innocent man when you do what is right in the sight of the Lord. "When you go to war against your enemies, and the Lord your God has delivered them into your hands, and you have taken prisoners, and amongst those prisoners you see a beautiful woman that you desire to have as a wife, then you are to bring her into your house, and she shall shave her head and pare her nails, and remain in your house for a full month to mourn her father and mother. After that you may go into her, and become her husband and she shall become your wife. If it shall turn out that you have no delight in her, then you shall let her go free - but you are not to sell her into slavery, because you have humiliated her. "If a man has two wives, one that he loves and one that he hates, both of whom have borne him children, and the firstborn son is from the wife he hates, he may not give the birthright of the "firstborn" to the firstborn son of his beloved wife, because his firstborn son of the hated wife is indeed the firstborn. He shall acknowledge the son of the hated, by giving him a double portion of the inheritance, for he is the beginning of his strength, and that is his birthright. "If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father or mother, and that even when punished will not listen, then his father and mother shall bring him out to the elders of the city, and they shall say to the elders, 'This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us, and he is a glutton and a drunkard.' All the men of his city shall then stone him to death, so shall you put away evil from among you and all of the nation of Israel will hear about this and fear this. "If a man has committed a sin worthy of death, and when executed you hang him on a tree, his body shall not remain all night upon the tree, but must be buried the same day - for he that is hanged is accursed of God, and the land which the Lord your God has given you as an inheritance must not be defiled."
Thoughts:	Moses begins this chapter by stating that if the body of a murdered man is found lying in a field and it's not known who killed him, then the elders and judges of the land are to go to the nearest city and find the elders of that city. The city's elders are to take a heifer that has never been yoked or worked in the fields, and after bringing it down to a virgin stream in the valley, somehow breaking the cow's neck and decapitating it will allow the priests to bless the dead body (the man's, not the cow's) and absolve the people of Israel from the guilt of the death of an innocent man. This is probably another one of those "eye for an eye" type lines of thought, where in lieu of being able to kill a human being with capital punishment, that the Israelites have to kill something to appease their bloodthirsty God. Next up, Moses states that if and when the Israelites win a war against their enemies - as long as they're not enemies that live in the "promised land" - and if there's a pretty girl amongst the prisoners they've taken, then you can bring her into your house, have her shave her head and pare her nails, and then mourn for the next month in your house for her dead parents that you've killed. After the month is up, you can then have sex with her and you'll be her husband. If afterward you don't like your new wife, you can let her go free, but you're not allowed to sell her into slavery, because you've humiliated her. Basically, Moses is saying that if there's a pretty girl amongst the prisoners of war, you can bring her home against her will, rape her, and she gets the "privilege" of becoming your wife. Then if you later discover that you just don't like her, feel free to boot her out the door, just be sure not to sell her into slavery. How one can justify the blatant misogyny and complete disrespect of women that Moses is advocating is completely beyond me. Moses then shifts the topic to polygamy - something I discussed at length recently with a Christian "reader" of this blog. Moses says that if a man has two wives - one that he loves and one that he hates, and has sons with both of them, with the firstborn son belonging to the hated wife, he is not allowed to give the "firstborn birthright" to the firstborn son of his favored wife, just because he hates his firstborn son's mother. The birthright still goes to the oldest son, as Moses reasons that this son is the "beginning of his [father's] strength". All should work as intended unless the boy sells his birthright for a bowl of soup. Next, Moses addresses what to do with your unruly son. If your son is stubborn and rebellious and doesn't respond to being punished, then the mother and father must bring him out to the elders of the city and tell them that their son is stubborn and rebellious (and for good measure, add in that he's also a glutton and a drunk). All of the men of the city then are to stone the child to death, so that you can purge the nation of Israel from evil and frighten other children into obeying. Yes, the best way according to the bible to deal with unruly children is to kill them brutally with stones, so that you can set an example for other children and control them with fear. Finally, Moses states that if your preferred method of execution is hanging, then you have to remove the dead person's body from the tree you hanged him upon and bury them before the day is through, because a hanged body will apparently defile the "promised land" if left up for too long.

NUMBERS: A Recap

The book of Numbers can easily be summed up as to what God does to you when you complain a lot. I started this book in late July and have only now finished it in early November. Some of that is attributed to events in my personal life, but a good portion of the delay was also brought upon by how insane the book of Numbers can be to read as well.

The book begins true to it's name with Moses conducting several censuses of the various tribes of Israel and where they are to camp as the Israelites wander through the desert. God also comes up with a convoluted scheme to "own" the tribe of Levi by arguing that the tribe will actually be a substitution for all the "firstborn males" that God feels he's entitled to, but also manages to scam out some money for the church by using bad math against the rest of the tribes of Israel.

God appoints the Levites to transport the tabernacle around the desert, but under the threat that if they mishandle the tabernacle in anyway that they will be killed, and that anyone else aside from the Levites performing their jobs is to be killed as well.

After having Moses and Aaron purge the camp of lepers, God establishes his "law of jealousies" enabling jealous husbands to put their wife through a humiliating test to "prove" their fidelity, and punishable by horrible disfigurement if they're deemed to have been unfaithful, and "blessed" with becoming pregnant if they pass the test. Regardless of how the test turns out, the husband is never guilty of "sin", as it's apparently his wife's fault for causing his jealousy in the first place - even if she's been faithful to him.

Next up in God's law books is his requirements for a person who wishes to become a Nazarite, which is a temporary vow to God where the person is to avoid cutting their hair, drinking alcohol, or going near a dead body (even if a person happens to die in your presence). At the end of the vow the person is to shave their head, set the hair on fire at the tabernacle, and sacrifice some animals and grains.

Chapter 7 deals with all of the leaders of each tribe of Israel donating collectively to the tabernacle: 36 pounds of silver, 3 pounds of gold, and sacrifice 256 animals over a twelve day period.

After instructing Moses in how to conduct a ceremony to consecrate the Levites - after shaving off all of their body hair and sacrificing a couple of bulls, he spells out some laws concerning what to do is someone defiles themselves or is on vacation during "Passover", and has the people of Israel build some silver trumpets for sounding alarms.

After a chapter where we either get yet another name for Moses' father-in-law, or we are introduced to Moses' brother-in-law, the Israelites finally leave their camp site at the base of Mount Sinai. Unfortunately, the Israelites started to whine shortly afterward so God got angry and set them on fire until Moses prayed for God to stop immolating people.

The people started complaining again (right after having been set on fire) about their diet of "manna", desiring to eat meat again, and God sends them an over-abundance of quails (enough quails, as God says, that the Israelites will vomit meat "out of their nostrils" (Numbers 11:20) and grew tired of eating quails. Once the people began eating the quails though, God gets mad at them for doing so and smites them with a plague.

Meanwhile Moses' siblings Aaron and Miriam complain about Moses' Ethiopian wife, so God infects Miriam with leprosy (while Aaron gets out of punishment freely since he is the head priest) and argues that Moses is the "meekest man on earth". When Moses and Aaron beg God to reverse Miriam's leprosy, he agrees but under the stipulation that he'll only cure her after she remains exiled for seven days.

God has Moses sends out some spies to check out the "promised land", but becomes enraged when the spies discourage the people from invading the land because the land is inhabited by giants (the spies also bring home giant clusters of grapes). Except for the two dissenting spies, Caleb and Joshua, God kills off the rest of the spies with a plague for "slandering" the "promised land". When the people began complaining again, God wants to kill them all until Moses talks him out of it. God decides instead that none of them except for Caleb and Joshua will live to enter the "promised land" and decides to make the people of Israel wander around in the desert for forty years until the current generation dies off. The next day the Israelites decide to attempt to invade Canaan instead of God's insistence that they simply wander around in the desert, but because God doesn't help them in battle, they are chased off by the Canaanites and Amalekites.

After laying out some more laws on sacrificing animals, the Israelites see a man gathering sticks on the sabbath and God commands that they stone him to death. Afterward God also tells the Israelites to make fringes upon their garments attached with blue ribbons.

A group of over 250 men led by a man named Korah, wage a rebellion against Aaron and Moses' leadership. Moses dares the 250 men to light some "holy incense", and when they do just that, God sets them all on fire and then causes an earthquake to swallow up the rest of the men in the rebellion - along with their families. The Israelites complained about Moses and Aaron leading these men to their deaths, so God tells Moses and Aaron to move out of the way so that he can kill them all. God sends a plague, Aaron rushes to light some incense to appease God and stop the plague, but not before God has killed 14,700 people with his plague.

Moses and Aaron devise a "test" to prove their divine right to leadership - Moses has eleven of the twelve tribes sign their names on a stick while Aaron signs the twelfth, Moses puts the sticks in the tabernacle overnight - which only he, Aaron, and Aaron's sons are allowed to enter, and tells the Israelites that whomever's stick blooms with buds, flowers, and almonds the following day is the rightful leader of the Israelites. Of course Aaron wins the contest, and Moses puts Aaron's blossomed stick in the tabernacle as a reminder to the people to not question God's choice in leadership again.

After laying out some more rules and regulations regarding the Levites, God sends Moses and Aaron out to procure a red calf, that after being slaughtered and burned, its ashes are to be mixed in with "holy water" to form a "purification water" to purify people who've touched a corpse.

Moses' sister Miriam dies out in the desert, and the Israelites again find themselves without water. Moses and Aaron botch God's instructions for getting water out of a rock - despite the fact that 1) It worked and 2) they used the same technique that they used prior - and that neither Moses or Aaron shall live to set foot in the "promised land". The Israelites try to get the king of Edom (who were descended from Esau) to let them pass through their land, but the king sends his army to chase them away. They wind up at Mount Hor, where God decides to kill Aaron and appoints Eleazar to take over as the high priest.

The Israelites are then attacked by the Canaanites and some are taken prisoner. The people bargain with God, promising to destroy King Arad's cities if God would deliver the captive people back to the congregation - so the Canaanites and their cities were utterly destroyed, and the region was renamed to reflect that. The Israelites however got discouraged again, so God gets angry and retaliates by unleashing "fiery serpents" upon them. When the Israelites turn to Moses pleading for their lives, Moses forges a statue of a "fiery serpent" out of bronze, puts it on a pole, and tells the people that if they get bit by a snake, all they have to do is to look at Moses' statue and they won't die from their snakebites.

The Israelites requested passage through King Sihon's kingdom, and when he refused and attacked them, the Israelites defeated his army and took all of his cities. When the Israelites approached King Og's army, God tells them to do the exact same thing to King Og as they had done to King Sihon - they defeated his army, killed all of his people, leaving no survivors, and took his land.

King Balak, the king of Moab, fearing that his kingdom would be invaded and conquered by the Israelites as well, summoned a prophet named Balaam to come help him and to curse the Israelites. God initially refuses to let Balaam go, but relents and tells Balaam that he can go, so long as he follows God's instructions to a tee. However, when Balaam leaves the next morning, God gets angry with Balaam and sends an angel to hinder his journey. Only his donkey seems to see the angel blocking the way and the donkey tries to navigate around the angel, but gives up and lays down when the angel blocks a narrow path between two walls. After Balaam beats the donkey for disobeying him, the donkey talks to him and ask him what it had done to deserve such a beating. The angel finally reveals himself to Balaam and also asks why he had beaten the donkey. Balaam sees his mistake and the angel lets him pass, but he gets chewed out by King Balak for delaying his visit.

Balaam and King Balak sacrifice a bunch of animals, and Balaam receives a prophesy from God. However, God won't allow Balaam to curse the Israelites, and under God's instruction he blesses them instead much to the dismay of King Balak. King Balak tries again two more times before giving up in anger and disgust.

The Israelites are now seduced by the local Moabite women, and they coax them into worshiping their gods. God tells Moses to kill the leaders of the Israelites tribes and hang their corpses up in public view, as well as to kill everyone who worshiped any of the Moabite gods. An Israelite named Zimri however, snuck in a Midianite woman into the camp and Aaron's grandson Phinehas barged into their tent and impaled them both while they were copulating. Phinehas' handiwork apparently stopped one of God's plagues (which is never described, or is a reason given for it) which had killed 24,000 people. God rewards Phinehas with an "everlasting priesthood" for him and his descendants. He then tells Moses to "vex the Midianites" (despite the fact that his wife Zipporah and her family are Midianites), and blames them for the worshiping of other gods in Moab (even though the chapter specifies that it were Moabite women who led the Israelites astray).

Moses takes another census of all men fit to serve the military, and is told to divide up the "promised land" amongst the tribes, giving bigger pieces of land to the bigger tribes. However, a group of women demand property rights as their father had died and left behind no male heirs. God grants them property rights and allows for a man's daughter to inherit property (although she has to share it with her uncles) in the event of the man having no male heirs.

God then tells Moses that he will die once he has seen the "promised land" since he "rebelled" against God with the "striking the rock" incident. Moses asks God to pick a successor to lead the Israelites after his death, so God picks Joshua, and has Moses give Joshua a public ceremony to signify his leadership to the people.

God lays out even more demands for animal sacrifices, as well as establishing more animal sacrifices for various holidays. He also gives some rules about making vows, and how women's vows can be overruled by her father or her husband.

God now tells Moses to get revenge against the Midianites, and has him send the Israelites out to battle. The Israelites kill all of the men, but take the women and children prisoner, bringing them home along with all the valuables that they looted. Moses was furious that they had left anyone alive and ordered the troops to kill the women and male children, but stated that the soldiers could keep the female virgins for themselves. Moses exiles those soldiers who had come in contact with any dead bodies, or who were responsible for any killing, out of camp for seven days for "purification" and divides up the loot amongst the soldiers, the priests, the Levites, and the common people of Israel.

Upon their travels the tribes of Gad and Reuben convince a reluctant Moses that they'd rather take the nice cattle friendly land of Gilead than their inheritance in the "promised land". The tribes convince Moses to allow them to reside in Gilead providing they follow through on their military commitments to conquering Canaan and driving out the inhabitants currently residing in the "promised land" there. (The tribe of Manasseh also becomes allowed to reside in Gilead after they drive the inhabitants of Gilead out of the city.)

Moses has apparently been keeping a written record of the entire exodus, and is later told by God that every last Canaanite is to be driven out of the land, and that all of their images, statues, and altars are to be torn down and destroyed. Any Canaanite not driven out of the "promised land" will be a "thorn in the side" of the Israelites, and God will also do unto the Israelites what he "had thought to do" to the Canaanites.

God then sets the border lines for the "promised land" and appoints leaders from each tribe to assist in dividing up the land for each family. God also requires that the Levites are to be given a total of 48 cities (and surrounding suburb land) from the other tribes, and that six of these cities are to be "cities of refuge", where people who have accidentally killed someone can flee to safety away from their victim's family seeking revenge - but if the "revenger" finds them outside of the "city of refuge", then it's perfectly okay for them to kill the innocent person.

Finally, the book closes out with the clan of Gilead (from the tribe of Manasseh) complaining about a loophole in the property rights of the daughters from Chapter 27, and God amends his law to stipulate that if a man's daughters inherit land, they will only be allowed to marry within their own tribe - as otherwise the land would go to whichever tribe her husband belonged to.

NUMBERS: Chapter 31

Chapter 31
Summary:	God speaks to Moses telling him to seek vengeance upon the Midianites, and in turn Moses speaks to the people of Israel and tells them to arm themselves for war against the land of Midian. Moses commands that each tribe of Israel conscripts 1,000 soldiers to send to war. Moses sent them to war - a thousand from every tribe - led by Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, carrying "holy instruments" and trumpets. The Israelites battled the Midianites and slew all of the males. They slew the five kings of Midian - Evi, Rekem, Zur, Hur, and Reba - as well as Balaam the prophet who they slew with the sword. The Israelites took all of the Midianite women and children captive; took the spoils of their cattle, flocks, and goods; and burnt their cities and castles to the ground. The Israelite soldiers brought the captives and their war spoils before Moses and Eleazar, and before the congregation of the people of Israel camped on the plains of Moab by the Jordan River near Jericho. Moses however was angry with the officers of the army which emerged from battle. Moses asked them why they had let the Midianite women live, stating that these are the very women that followed Balaam's advice and committed trespass against God in the matter of Peor and caused God to send a plague amongst the Israelites*. Moses tells them: 31:17 "Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him." Moses adds that they are to keep all of the virgin female children ("that have not known a man by lying with him") for themselves. Moses instructs that anyone who had killed a person in battle or had touched a dead body must reside outside of the camp for seven days, purifying themselves and their captives on the third and seventh days. Also to be purified are all garments and anything made from leather, goat's hair, or wood. Eleazar then spoke to the soldiers, speaking an ordinance of the law of which God gave to Moses. He tells the soldiers that every metal that can withstand fire - gold, silver, brass, iron, tin, and lead - shall be passed through fire to purify it, and then further purified with the "water of separation". Anything that cannot withstand the flames must be purified with the water alone. He finishes by telling them to wash their clothes on the seventh day, and they shall then be "clean" and allowed to return to the camp. God then speaks to Moses telling him and Eleazar to take a total of all of the spoils the soldiers had looted - both people and animal - and divide them into two parts. Half is to go to the soldiers, and half is to go to the rest of the people of Israel. He tells Moses further, that the half belonging to the soldiers is to be taxed - where one out of every 500 captive, ox, donkey, and sheep is to "belong to God" and is to be given to Eleazar for a "heave offering". Out of the half belonging to the people of Israel, one portion out of fifty (2 percent) is to be given to the Levites who keep charge of the tabernacle. Moses and Eleazar did as God commanded, and the total booty was: 675,000 sheep 72,000 oxen 61,000 donkeys 32,000 young virgin girls The half given to the army: 337,500 sheep (of which 675 were given to Eleazar) 36,000 oxen (of which 72 were given to Eleazar) 30,500 donkeys (of which 61 were given to Eleazar) 16,000 virgin girls (32 of which were "God's portion"*) The half given to the people of Israel: 337,500 sheep (of which 6750 were given to the Levites) 36,000 oxen (of which 720 were given to the Levites) 30,500 donkeys (of which 610 were given to the Levites) 16,000 virgin girls (of which 320 were given to the Levites) The officers and battalion leaders came to Moses and told him that all of the men that had been sent to war had been accounted for, and that not a single one of them had been killed or is missing. Therefore the officers brought a tribute from their spoils consisting of gold jewelry, chains, bracelets, rings, earrings, and necklaces, in order to "make atonement for their souls". Moses and Eleazar took the jewelry from the military leaders and found its value to be worth 16,750 shekels. Moses and Eleazar took the gold to the tabernacle for a memorial for the people of Israel before God.
Notes:	1.) According to Numbers Chapter 25 it was the Moabite women not the Midianite women who were responisble for the incident at Mount Peor. 2.) It is unclear whether the 32 virgins became human sacrifices, or were given to the Levites to rape.
Thoughts:	Apparently God isn't through with the Midianites after their last encounter with the people of Israel in Chapter 25 and tells Moses that he wants to seek revenge on them. He tells Moses to mobilize an army to attack the Midianites in their home land. Moses gathers 1,000 troops from each tribe and sends them to war, appointing Phinehas (Eleazar's son who brutally killed an Israelite for bringing a Midianite woman into the camp, impaling them both together with a spear) to lead the armies with his "holy instruments" and trumpets. The Israelites triumphed in battle and slew all of the males, including the five kings of Midian, and even the prophet Balaam - although the fate of his talking donkey is uncertain. The Israelites took all of the Midianite women and children captive and looted their cattle, flocks, and goods before burning their cities and castles to the ground. The Israelite soldiers returned to camp and were met by Moses and Eleazar in the plains of Moab. Moses however was furious with the officers of the army when he found that they had let the Midianite women live stating that they had "commit[ted] trespass against the Lord in the matter of Peor", causing a plague amongst the Israelites. This is not corroborated by the story in Numbers Chapter 25 as it appears in the bible. The bible clearly implicates the Moabite women in the "matter of Peor", and the "cause" of the plague is not specified at all - only that Phineas' slaying of a Midianite woman caused the plague to stop - after killing 24,000 Israelites. It's also not explained as to how or whether Balaam encouraged the women to "commit trespass" to begin with. Moses follows this up with perhaps one of the most vile and immoral verses contained in the bible: 31:17 "Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him." The verse that follows actually more repulsive and disgusting: 31:18 "But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.." What Moses is saying here is for the soldier to kill every woman and male child - except for the virgin girls which the soldiers can keep for themselves. Yes, this is the same Moses whom the bible describes as the "meekest man on earth", stating that it's okay to murder women and children prisoners of war, unless you find some virgin girls amongst the bunch, then you can keep them for yourself as sex partners against their will. These two verse are so appalling and inexcusable that I had to go searching for some apologetic answers to them, to which I will be following up and rebutting in the following post. There is simply no way to excuse these two verses as anything but barbaric, disgusting, and immoral, there is just no context in which that behavior can be justified - period. Moses then makes every soldier who killed in battle or touched a corpse reside outside of the camp for a week to purify themselves, reminding them that they'd have to purify themselves and their captives (i.e. the virgin girls they were allowed to rape keep for themselves) on the third and seventh days. They would also have to purify all garments and anything made from leather, goat's hair, or wood. Eleazar then addresses the soldiers, telling them that any metal that they looted that can withstand fire will have to be passed through flames to purify it, and then further be purified with the bizarre "water of separation" ritual described in Numbers Chapter 19. Anything that can't withstand flame will simply have to be washed in the "water of separation" alone. He finished up by telling the soldiers to wash their clothes on the seventh day of their exile, and that they'll be "clean" and allowed to return to the camp after that. God then tells Moses and Eleazar to count up all of the spoils that the soldiers looted from the Midianites and to divide them up in half. One half is to go to the soldiers who did the looting, and the other is to go to the people of Israel, but before Moses ponies out the riches, God wants his cut. He taxes the soldiers cut a mere .20% - where one out of every 500 ox, donkey, sheep, or virgin is to "belong to God" - or more aptly, is given to Eleazar for a "heave offering". Out of the people's half, a 2% tax is levied upon them with the spoils going to the Levites. The bible gives us the totals of each half's take (675,000 sheep; 72,000 oxen; 61,000 donkeys; and 32,000 virgin girls) and what percentages are "God's portion" - where curiously it isn't explained what happens to the virgins in "God's portion". Priests are forbidden from marrying foreign women, so they couldn't have become Eleazar's concubines, so either they were just passed off for others to rape or they might have been human sacrifices(?) - the bible isn't clear here. The military leaders then decide to present Moses and Eleazar with a donation to the tabernacle of some of the gold jewelry they had looted, pointing out that not a single soldier was lost or killed in battle. Moses and Eleazar happily took the 16,750 shekels worth of gold and stashed it inside the tabernacle for a memorial for the people of Israel before God.

LEVITICUS: Chapter 24

Chapter 24
Summary:	God speaks to Moses, telling him to command the people of Israel to bring pure olive oil to make an "eternal flame" for the golden lamps outside the veil in the tabernacle. Aaron is to supply these lamps with fresh oil each morning and evening to keep the fire burning continuously, which is to be maintained by all future generations. Also, twelve loaves of bread are to be baked from two tenth deals* of fine flour. The bread shall be placed in two rows, six in each row, upon the golden table in the tabernacle. Pure frankincense shall be sprinkled along each row, and the bread will be a memorial offering by fire made to God each sabbath as an everlasting covenant between God and the people of Israel. Aaron and his sons shall eat this bread in a "holy place", for it is most "holy" being made by fire, and this shall be a permanent statute. Moving back into a narrative, a son of an Israeli woman (whose father was an Egyptian* and got into a dispute with an Israeli man within the camp. The Israeli woman's son "blasphemed" God's name and cursed. He was then brought before Moses by the people of Israel (it is mentioned that his mother's name was Shelomith, the daughter of Dibri, of the tribe of Dan) and he was jailed until God's judgment of him could be decided. God tells Moses to bring the blasphemer outside of the camp and have everyone that heard him blaspheme to place their hands upon his head - before having all of the congregation stone him. God tells Moses to relay to the people of Israel that whomever curses God shall bear his "sin", and that anyone who blasphemes God shall surely be put to death - all of the congregation shall certainly stone him. This applies to any Israeli or foreigner in the land - he who blasphemes God's name shall be put to death. God adds that "he who killeth any man shall surely be put to death" and "he that killeth an animal" shall replace it. God also states that any man that injures another shall be injured the same himself - "breach for breach, eye for eye, tooth for tooth". God repeats that he that kills an animal shall replace it, and he that kills a man shall be put to death. The people of Israel shall keep the same law for those who are born in the land and for foreigners to the land as well. Moses spoke to the people of Israel that they should bring the one who blasphemed out of the camp and to stone him to death. The people of Israel did as God had commanded Moses.
Notes:	1.) Approximately a fifth of a bushel. 2.) Most likely the mention of an Egyptian father is to remove any possible sympathy for the Israeli woman's son - as the Egyptians are typically portrayed as villainous heathens throughout the bible.
Thoughts:	God tells Moses to have the people of Israel gather some pure olive oil to light an "eternal flame" in the golden lamps hanging outside the veil in the tabernacle. He tells Moses that Aaron is (as well as his future descendants are) to supply the lamps with fresh oil twice a day - once in the morning, once in the evening - to keep the fire continuously burning. Twelve loaves of bread are to be be made every week on the sabbath and placed on the golden table in the tabernacle as well. Arranged in two rows of six, frankincense is to be sprinkled on the loaves of bread and this somehow is to symbolize the covenant between God and the Israeli people. Aaron and his sons, of course, get to eat the loaves of bread - but only in a "holy place". This tradition is also to be a permanent statute. Strangely, this chapter of Leviticus now shifts away from God decreeing laws to Moses and turns into a narrative story about the son of an Israeli woman, who we can tell is going to end badly when it is mentioned that he is also the son of an "evil" heathenistic Egyptian. It is not stated how old this son of the Israeli woman (who is given the name Shelomith, and is noted to be the daughter of Dibri, whom apparently descended from the tribe of Dan) might be, but God seems rather indifferent towards whether children should be tried on the same terms as an adult anyways. The half-breed child (note that half-breed children are also usually frowned upon in the bible) gets into a dispute with a full blooded Israeli and during the conflict apparently curses God. The blasphemer is now brought before Moses and jailed while Moses consults God on how to deal with him - which should already be apparent to Moses considering he's the one who supposedly brought the "ten commandments" down from Mount Sinai. God's punishment for improperly or irreverantly using his name is of course a vicious brutal death by stoning. Simply because someone was using his name improperly and "insulting" him. Now, of course God admits many times (including within the ten commandments itself) that he is a vengeful and jealous God, but to place so much self-importance on someone incorrectly using or "insulting" your name that you have to impose a brutal death sentence of being stoned to death upon them, and then not even doing the killing yourself, but making the people of Israel do it for him? In the United States of America one of the greatest freedoms we have is the First Ammendment of the Constitution which guarrantees the right to free speech. While it protects the rights of people to criticize their government and its leaders, it also allows people with messages of hate to also voice their opinion, such as the charming Westboro Baptist Church who picket funerals of gays, the U.S. Military, and others with picket signs proclaiming that "God hates Fags" and "God hates America". As ugly and ignorant as these people are, I support their rights to be idiots as long as they can remain peaceful. The late George Carlin said it best, proclaiming that "there are no bad words" only bad intents in their meanings and expression. Language should never be punished and certainly never by death, and especially when it's some "benevolent" leader who's somehow offended that someone used his name in a manner in which he doesn't approve of. It often confuses me when people describe the God of the bible as a "loving", "just", and "benevolent" supernatural being when we're confronted with such stories such as this one. I often wonder how we could possibly be reading the same bible and seeing completely different viewpoints on the nature of God. Perhaps my idea of "benevolence" just doesn't include having a bunch of people stone somebody else to death for using God's name in a way that he disapproves of. God hammers the point home by stating that anyone - not just half-breed people of partial Egyptian heathen bloodlines - who "blasphemes" God's name is to be put to death - presumably, just as brutally by a good ol' stoning. He tacks on that "he who kills any man shall surely be put to death" - presumably there is an exception for people that kill on God's command. He follows up his vengeful logic with that any man that injures another should be injured the same way - "an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth", which is quite different from the message Jesus will later preach, concerning "turning the other cheek" (however, Jesus also has some pretty vengeful things to say later on, as we'll come across much later). So, Moses delivers God's message to the people of Israel and the people drag the blasphemer out to the outside of the camp and stone him to death - simply for uttering God's name in a manner that God found offensive.

GENESIS: Chapters 41 & 42

Chapter 41
Summary:	One night two years later, the Pharaoh dreamed that he was standing on the Nile when suddenly seven sleek, fat cows emerged from the river and began grazing on the grass nearby. A second set of seven cows, these being skinny and emaciated, emerged from the river and ate the seven fat cows. The Pharaoh woke up, but he drifted back to sleep having a second dream. This time he dreamed of seven heads of grain on one stalk, with every kernel being well formed and plump. Suddenly seven more kernels appeared on the stalk, but these were shriveled by the eastern winds. Finally the shriveled kernels swallowed the plump kernels before the Pharaoh once again woke up. The next morning, as the Pharaoh pondered about the dreams meaning he summoned all the magicians and sages of Egypt to interpret his dreams to no avail. Finally the Pharaoh's wine taster spoke up about Joseph and told him about the dreams that he and the baker had, and how Joseph had predicted their futures with perfect accuracy. The Pharaoh sent for Joseph at once, who was rushed out of prison, washed, shaved, and given a fresh set of clothes before appearing before the Pharaoh. The Pharaoh asks Joseph if he can interpret the dreams that his sages and magicians could not, and Joseph tells him that although he alone cannot, God can interpret his dreams. The Pharaoh then repeats his dreams to Joseph. Joseph tells him that both dreams meant the same thing: that God was telling him what he is planning to do in the land of Egypt. He explains that the seven fat cows and well-formed heads of grain meant that seven years of prosperity lay ahead, and that the seven skinny cows and withered heads of grain signified a famine would follow for the next seven years. He further explains that the double dream gives double impact and will surely happen as God decreed it. Joseph then suggests to the Pharaoh that he find the wisest man in Egypt and place him in charge of administration of Egypt's farming, and to appoint officials to collect a fifth of all the crops to store away for the seven years of famine. Pharaoh was impressed by his interpretation and his suggestions, and noted that since God has revealed the meaning of these dreams to Joseph, that he must be the wisest man in Egypt. He then appoints Joseph to become the administrator of the land, only to be outranked by the Pharaoh himself. The Pharaoh placed his own signet ring on Joseph's finger and dressed him in lavish clothing to signify his authority. He also gives to Joseph a chariot and a wife - a girl named Asenath, daughter of Potiphera, priest of Heliopolis - making Joseph famous throughout Egypt at the age of 30. Just as Joseph had predicted, the next seven years yielded a crop surplus that Joseph stored in the granaries over various cities throughout Egypt. Over the next seven years the granaries were either full overflowing. Before the arrival of the first year of the famine, two sons were born to Joseph by Asenath. He named his oldest son Manasseh (meaning "Made to Forget*") and the youngest was named Ephraim (meaning "Fruitful"). As the years of famine began, just as Joseph had predicted, people began to starve. They pleaded with the Pharaoh for food, and the Pharaoh sent them to Joseph, who sold grain to the Egyptians and to travelers from other lands who came to Egypt in search of food.
Notes:	1.) Alluding to God making up to him the anguish suffered in his youth.
Thoughts:	Joseph's dream interpretations come to his own rescue from prison when the wine taster finally remembers about Joseph in the Pharaoh's time of need. Much like I wrote about in my thoughts about Chapter 40 the fortune telling aspect of dreams makes little sense in regards to what we know about dream states today. Even with our knowledge aside and for the sake of argument allowing supernatural elements to explain things, the notion that dreams can or are predicting the future - or God's will - still makes little sense at all. What is actually being implied here in this chapter? That all dreams are prophetic (which we know is not true), that God can choose to reveal prophecies through dreams, that God feels the need to reveal prophecies to select people or to everyone? Why does God need to communicate messages in the forms of riddled symbolism and metaphor (recall that this is not limited to just the Egyptians, Joseph had these riddled dreams as a child as well), when at other times he appears to people in dreams giving clear and concise messages (such as to Laban in Chapter 31)? Also, quite frankly, these riddled dreams aren't very impressive in their terms of difficulty to discern, which makes it very hard to swallow that no-one in Egypt could have guessed the same - or at least similar - answer that Joseph provided. Nowadays we have all sorts of unqualified "professional psychics", mystics, and mentalists who literally have boatloads of guesses and hunches to what people's dreams may mean and often try their hands predicting the future with comical results. I find it difficult to believe that with the tendency of human nature to clamor towards fame that nobody in Egypt could take a stab as to what the Pharaoh's dream meant. So, Joseph becomes a wealthy celebrity around Egypt and immediately becomes the Pharaoh's second in command (even before waiting around to see if Joseph's prophecies come true or not) and is entrusted with the country's agriculture stock. He's given a wife and a fancy ride and manages to have two sons before the famine comes, only to now become richer from selling the grain he stocked to not only the citizens of Egypt, but to those traveling from other nearby countries.
Chapter 42
Summary:	When Jacob*/Israel heard that there was grain available in Egypt he sends his ten oldest sons there to buy some. Jacob however, wouldn't let his youngest son Benjamin join his brothers out of fear that something might happen to him, as like had happened to Benjamin's older brother Joseph. As Joseph was governor of all Egypt, and in charge of selling the grain, it was to him that his brothers came and bowed low before him. Joseph recognized them immediately but pretended as though he didn't. As Joseph asks them where they are from he remembers the dreams from his childhood, but he accuses his brothers before him of being spies, charging that they came to judge how destitute the land of Egypt had become during the famine. The brothers swore their innocence, further explaining that they were of 12 brothers from Canaan, that their youngest brother was staying behind with their father, and that another of their brothers had died. Joseph continued to feign disbelief in their story and told them that he needed proof to verify their story. He told the brothers that they could confirm their story by bringing their younger brother before him, but that he would allow only one of them to retrieve him while the other nine brothers would be kept in prison. Before a choice was to be made, he threw all ten of them into prison for three days. After three days in prison, Joseph tells them that he will take a chance on assuming them as honorable, by allowing them all to leave except one, and that the rest may go home with grain for their families. However, he insists that they must still bring their youngest brother before him if they wish to be spared. Speaking amongst themselves the brothers began blaming themselves for their situation on account for what they had done to Joseph years ago. Reuben chimed in claiming that he had insisted all along that killing Joseph was a bad idea, believing that they were now all going to die on account of it. The brothers were unaware that Joseph was able to understand them as they spoke as he had been speaking to them through an interpreter. Joseph left the room to weep in private, and upon his return he selected Simeon to remain in prison while he released the rest of his brothers. Joseph then ordered his servants to fill the men's grain sacks with grain and secretly told his servants to also put each brother's payment at the top of his sack. The brothers loaded up their donkeys with the grain sacks and headed back home. When they stopped for the night, one of the brothers* opened his sack to get some grain to feed the donkeys and spotted his money at the top of the sack. Trembling they wondered aloud what was it that God was doing to them. When they returned to Canaan they told their story to their father Jacob, and as they emptied their sacks they all discovered their money at the top of each bag. Fear engulfed them as well as their father. Jacob cried that he had been bereaved of his children, stating the loss of Joseph, Simeon not coming back, and now losing Benjamin too. Reuben offered to Jacob permission to kill his two sons if he doesn't bring Benjamin back, but Jacob refuses to let Benjamin go, stating that without Joseph, Benjamin alone is the only child left from his mother (Rachel), and that if anything should happen to Benjamin, Jacob would die.
Notes:	1.) Israel is inexplicably referred to again by his former name of Jacob in this chapter. 2.) It is not specified as to which brother.
Thoughts:	We begin chapter 42 with a strange reversion back to Israel's birth name of Jacob for reasons that aren't clear. As the famine affects Jacob's family, he sends his sons to Egypt where there is a surplus of grain to purchase. Out of fear of losing him, Jacob does not allow Benjamin to accompany his brothers to Egypt. When the brothers arrive, they're unaware that they're attempting to buy grain from their long lost and forgotten brother Joseph, however Joseph recalls them instantly. Joseph then begins messing with his brothers' heads by accusing them of being spies, locking them in jail for three days, insisting that they bring up Benjamin from Canaan to prove(?) that their story about being brothers is true(?), and by secretly giving their money back to them - filling them with terror that they may now be accused of being thieves as well as spies if they return. It's difficult to understand how - for the sake of logic - that bringing Benjamin up from Canaan would prove anything, and why the brothers didn't think of possibly bringing one of their sons to pose as Benjamin. In the context of the story we know why Joseph wants them to bring Benjamin and why the brothers are frightened at the prospect of having to do so, but the whole plot doesn't seem to make sense out of just using a bit of logic and common sense. How would they suspect that Joseph would be able to see past the rouse of bringing up one of Jacob's grandsons instead of Benjamin, or how Benjamin's presence proves that they aren't spies. Anyways, upon freaking his whole family out by placing their money into their grain sacks, Jacob doesn't seem to be willing to budge on letting Benjamin travel out to Egypt, so I guess Simeon can rot in jail for all Jacob cares.

GENESIS: Chapters 39 & 40

Chapter 39
Summary:	(As explained already in Chapter 37) when Joseph arrived in Egypt as a captive of the Ishmaelite traders, he was purchased by Potiphar, a officer of the Pharaoh. Potiphar was the captain of the Pharoah's bodyguards and his chief executioner. God greatly blessed Joseph in the home of his master so that everything he did, he succeeded. Potiphar took notice of this and realized that God was with Joseph, so Joseph gained favoritism with him. Soon Joseph was put in charge of the administration of the household and all of Potiphar's business affairs. God now began to bless Potiphar for the sake of Joseph. As the household ran smoothly, the crops and flocks flourished and multiplied, and Joseph was give complete responsibility over everything that Potiphar owned. Potiphar's wife began trying to seduce Joseph, but he refused her advances reminding her of his loyalty to Potiphar and that what she was suggesting was a great sin against God. However she kept on trying, and Joseph attempted to keep out of her way as much as possible. One day she catches Joseph alone, grabs his sleeve, and begs him to sleep with her. As he struggles to flee from her, Potiphar's wife is left with Joseph's jacket still in her hands and she decides to scream rape. When Potiphar arrived home his wife tells him that Joseph had tried to rape her and that she was saved only by her screams, while clutching his jacket. None too amused, Potiphar throws Joseph in prison. God blessed Joseph in his prison as well, and granted him favor with the chief jailer. Soon the jailer entrusted Joseph with the administration of the prison, and due to God's blessings, the prison ran smooth and efficiently.
Thoughts:	Joseph, apparently being God's chosen one now - ahead of his father Israel/Jacob - is (much like his father, his grandfather Isaac, and great-grandfather Abraham before him) blessed with a King Midas-like touch, where everything he does excels to the maximum. Even as a slave (and later a model prisoner) Joseph makes the best of the situation by being the best slave he can be, while upholding his loyalty and moral standards by refusing to be seduced by the lady of the house. However, when Mrs. Potiphar, being the sexually frustrated wife that she is, can't get Joseph to mess around she finds herself accusing Joseph of trying to rape her in order to get him thrown into prison. Much like his life as a slave, Joseph also excels at being a model prisoner and is soon running the prison (with God's help of course). Nothing is said about whether Potiphar's home-life goes to shambles or not, but I can only assume if he's visited the jail anytime while at work, that he's probably headed for Egyptian Divorce Court soon enough.
Chapter 40
Summary:	Sometime later the Pharaoh got upset with his chief baker and his wine taster and threw them into jail. They remained in prison for a while and Potiphar assigns Joseph to wait on them. One night both the baker and the wine taster had strange dreams, but couldn't find anyone to help figure them out. When Joseph hears about their dreams he tells them that interpreting dreams is God's business and asks them what they had dreamed. The wine taster went first and told Joseph that in his dream he saw a vine with three branches that began to blossom, soon providing clusters of ripe grapes. The wine taster finishes his dream, explaining that he had squeezed the grapes into the Pharaoh's wine cup and then gave it to him to drink. Joseph tells him that the dream means that in three days the Pharaoh will release him from prison and give him his job back. He then tells the wine taster to have pity on him and put in a good word to the Pharaoh on his behalf. The baker went next, telling Joseph that in his dream that he was carrying three baskets of pastries on his head, the topmost being filled with all sorts of baked goods for the Pharaoh, but that the birds swept by and ate them. Joseph explained to the baker that his dream signified that in three days the Pharaoh would decapitate him and impale his body on a stake, leaving the remains for the birds to pick at. The Pharaoh's birthday came three days later and preparing for his party he summoned both the baker and the wine taster from prison. As Jacob predicted, the wine taster was given back his job and the baker was executed. However, the wine taster forgot all about Joseph and never mentioned his plight to the Pharaoh.
Thoughts:	Dreams can be fascinating experiences, but they are not by any means some sort of magic fortune telling experience. Our dreams are a reflection of our subconscious, which means that the things we dream about are not predicting the unknown, but tapping into what we already do know. Dreams can seem magical where we can often do the impossible, but they are not telling us things we don't already know. To the ancients of the Bronze Age, who out of ignorance and superstition believed a lot of crazy things - like seamonsters dwelling in the oceans, the sun revolving around a flat earth, and mythical beings like giants - dreams must have seemed like a pathway to the gods to them. However fascinating dreams may be and the things they might tell us about ourselves, dreams do not tell the future any more so than a fortune cookie at a Chinese restaurant. I'm sure for the sake of our story we could assume that perhaps the supernatural, in the form of God, could have possibly guided these dreams, but it isn't stated and is presumptuous at best. The problem with taking the angle of a biblical apologist is that while trying to assert that the bible is in fact "truth" or the "word of God", it takes a lot of human interjection, guesses, and theory to explain things. If we're to assume truth in the biblical text, then shouldn't we just work with the information we have and not inject far fetched theories to explain the gaps? What I'm getting at is that the miraculous defies credibility, and if the miraculous did, or could happen, then the bible should be our only source of when and where that could have occurred. Inventing miraculous explanations of your own accord shouldn't be an option when there's no basis for making such a wild claim. Anyways, Joseph's story is meant to further enforce his connection and alliance with God - as he states that interpreting dreams is God's work - and sure enough his psychic predictions for both the baker and the wine taster come to fruition just as Joseph had said they would. We close off the chapter once again with a dig at how villainous the Egyptians can be when the wine taster forgets all about poor Joseph rotting away in prison.