DEUTERONOMY: Chapter 23

Chapter 23
Summary:	Moses' speech continues: "He who is wounded in the testicles, or has his penis cut off, shall not enter the congregation of the Lord. Nor shall a bastard enter the congregation of the Lord, even to his tenth generation will he not be allowed to enter the congregation of the Lord. Neither an Ammonite nor a Moabite are to enter the congregation of the Lord, even to their tenth generation will they not be allowed to enter the congregation of the Lord forever - because they met you not with bread and water when you were lead out of Egypt, and because they hired against you Balaam, the son of Beor, of Pethor of Mesopotamia, to curse you all. The Lord your God would not hearken unto Balaam, but instead the Lord your God turned the curse into a blessing unto you, because the Lord your God loved you. You shall not ever seek peace nor their prosperity with them throughout your generations. "You are not to abhor the Edomites, for they are your relatives; nor shall you abhor the Egyptians, because you were strangers in their land. Their children may enter the congregation of the Lord in their third generation. "When you go to war against your enemies, you are to keep away from every wicked thing. If there be amongst you any man who becomes unclean by reason of having a nocturnal emission, then that man is to leave the camp, and during the evening is to wash himself with water, and may return when the sun sets. "You are to have a place outside of the camp to use as a toilet. You shall carry a spade as part of your equipment, and you shall dig a hole and cover your bowel movements; for the Lord your God walks in the midst of your camp, to deliver you, and bring your enemies before you; therefore your camp shall remain holy, that he shall see no unclean thing, and turn away from you. "You are not to return a runaway slave to his master. He shall dwell with you, even amongst you, wherever he chooses. You are not to oppress him. "There shall be no whore amongst the daughters of Israel, nor a sodomite* amongst the sons of Israel. You are not to bring any proceeds earned from prostitution, or the price of a dog*, into the house of the Lord your God for any vow - for these are an abomination to the Lord your God. "You shall not demand interest upon a loan made to your fellow Israelite. You may add interest to a loan made to foreigner, but not to your fellow Israelite, that the Lord your God may bless you in all that you set your hand upon in the promised land, when you go to possess it. "When you make a vow to the Lord your God, you are prompt in paying, for the Lord requires it of you and it would be a sin not to fulfill the vow. However, if you don't make a vow, that is not a sin. Once the vow has been uttered, you are to keep it and perform it - even a freewill offering - exactly how you promised to the Lord your God. "When you pass your neighbor's vineyard, you may eat handfuls of their grapes to your pleasure, but you are not to gather the grapes in a container. When you pass your neighbor's corn field, you may pluck the ears with your hand, but you may not use a sickle on his crops."
Notes:	1.) The term "sodomite" (note the lack of capitalization) is refering to homosexuals, equating homosexuality in general to the violent rapists depicted in Genesis: Chapter 19 who lived in the city of Sodom. 2.) "Dog" in this sense, is referring to a male homosexual prostitute.
Thoughts:	This chapter Moses begins by listing the sorts of undesirables that should not be discriminated against from entering the sanctuary (the church). Anyone with testicular damage. Anyone who has had their penis cut off. (Sorry, John Bobbitt) A bastard (meaning a child from unwed parents), or even his offspring ten generations later Ammonites and Moabites - because their ancestry is responsible for trying to hire Balaam - the prophet with the talking donkey - to try and curse the Israelites. God is apparently obsessed with the condition of male genitalia, as not only does he demand that his priests not have damaged testicles, he simply doesn't want anybody with damaged testicles, or who's had their penis cut off, entering his "sanctuary" either. While I may have joked about John Bobbitt above, which some will point out that he's not exactly a great example of someone we should care about getting banned from a church, the point is that there isn't anything John (or anyone else with a severed penis) could do about that. It's simply wrong to discriminate against someone entering a church because of genital damage - period. Moses next discriminates against bastards, extending this discrimination to his tenth generation offspring. So what Moses is saying is that if a child is born to unmarried parents, even if his children and grandchildren marry and produce children, none of them are welcome in the church either. This is plainly discriminating against the status of one's ancestry. This would be equivalent of saying that if one of your ancestors had a prison record, then you're not allowed in the church. Next Moses targets both the Ammonites and the Moabites, reasoning that they were the people who tried to hire Balaam (the prophet with the talking donkey) to curse the Israelites. This sounds about as reasonable as refusing Japanese, Germans, and Italians from entering your church because of World War II. Moses even extends the discrimination against these people by telling the Israelites that they are never to seek peace or prosperity with them throughout their generations. This is pure racism measuring someone's worth with their nationality and the actions of their ancestors. Moses states however they are not to discriminate against the Edomites, for they are relatives to the Israelites - the Edomites being the descendants of Esau, the elder brother of Jacob (later to be renamed Israel) who sold his birthright to Jacob for a bowl of soup. Moses also strangely insists that the Israelites are not to discriminate against the Egyptians, reasoning that they were once "strangers in their land". It's curious that God seems to have less of a problem with the Egyptians who enslaved the Israelites for numerous generations, than he does for the Moabites for unsuccessfully attempting to curse the Israelites. Perhaps this may be due to the Egyptian Pharaoh's treatment of Joseph, the fact that God has killed an awful lot of Egyptians (also see Exodus: Chapter 14 too), or because the Israelites "committed whoredom with the daughters of Moab", despite that the Midianites would be brutally killed, and the young Midianite virgins raped in retribution. However, as we'll see in the book of Ruth (a Moabite woman), she will marry an Israelite and give birth to a son named Obed, who would become the grandfather of King David. If a soldier at war has a nocturnal emission (a "wet dream"), he is to leave the camp, wash himself with water, and not to return to the camp until sundown. Moses then explains that a place has to be set aside outside the camp to be used as a toilet, and that all bowel movements have to be buried because God "walks in the midst of the camp", and will not tolerate anything "unclean" in the camp. Next Moses states that a runaway slave is not to be returned to its master, nor is he to be oppressed. Although it is not specifically stated here, I think it is safe to assume that this probably only applies to Hebrew slaves that can be redeemed, and not to foreign slaves or Hebrew slaves that have been marked with an awl. Moses then declares that there is to be no prostitution amongst the Israelite women, nor a "sodomite" amongst the men. The term "sodomite", despite equating homosexual men to the inhabitants of the city of Sodom, is uncapitalized as a further indicator of how homosexuals are not to be granted any common civil respect. Furthering this, after Moses declares that proceeds earned by a female prostitute are not to be brought into the church, he makes the same declaration for male homosexual prostitutes, calling such proceeds "the price of a dog". Moses states that these proceeds are an "abomination" to God. One other thing to note is that Moses is not outright banning prostitution - while Moses forbids Israeli women from becoming prostitutes, he says nothing about Israeli men soliciting prostitutes, for example Judah soliciting his daughter-in-law who he believes to be a prostitute. Moses next states that no one is to tack on interest to any loan made to their fellow Israelite, but it's perfectly okay to add interest to a loan made to a foreigner. Moses' next warns that when one makes a vow to God they are to be prompt in fulfilling that vow exactly as they had promised, or else they have "sinned"; but notes that it's not a "sin" if you simply don't make a vow in the first place. Finally Moses tells the Israelites that if they're passing by a neighbor's vineyard or crops, that it's okay to eat as many handfuls as you desire from their crops, but you are not to collect any in a container, nor cut any down with a sickle to bring back home with you.

NUMBERS: A Recap

The book of Numbers can easily be summed up as to what God does to you when you complain a lot. I started this book in late July and have only now finished it in early November. Some of that is attributed to events in my personal life, but a good portion of the delay was also brought upon by how insane the book of Numbers can be to read as well.

The book begins true to it's name with Moses conducting several censuses of the various tribes of Israel and where they are to camp as the Israelites wander through the desert. God also comes up with a convoluted scheme to "own" the tribe of Levi by arguing that the tribe will actually be a substitution for all the "firstborn males" that God feels he's entitled to, but also manages to scam out some money for the church by using bad math against the rest of the tribes of Israel.

God appoints the Levites to transport the tabernacle around the desert, but under the threat that if they mishandle the tabernacle in anyway that they will be killed, and that anyone else aside from the Levites performing their jobs is to be killed as well.

After having Moses and Aaron purge the camp of lepers, God establishes his "law of jealousies" enabling jealous husbands to put their wife through a humiliating test to "prove" their fidelity, and punishable by horrible disfigurement if they're deemed to have been unfaithful, and "blessed" with becoming pregnant if they pass the test. Regardless of how the test turns out, the husband is never guilty of "sin", as it's apparently his wife's fault for causing his jealousy in the first place - even if she's been faithful to him.

Next up in God's law books is his requirements for a person who wishes to become a Nazarite, which is a temporary vow to God where the person is to avoid cutting their hair, drinking alcohol, or going near a dead body (even if a person happens to die in your presence). At the end of the vow the person is to shave their head, set the hair on fire at the tabernacle, and sacrifice some animals and grains.

Chapter 7 deals with all of the leaders of each tribe of Israel donating collectively to the tabernacle: 36 pounds of silver, 3 pounds of gold, and sacrifice 256 animals over a twelve day period.

After instructing Moses in how to conduct a ceremony to consecrate the Levites - after shaving off all of their body hair and sacrificing a couple of bulls, he spells out some laws concerning what to do is someone defiles themselves or is on vacation during "Passover", and has the people of Israel build some silver trumpets for sounding alarms.

After a chapter where we either get yet another name for Moses' father-in-law, or we are introduced to Moses' brother-in-law, the Israelites finally leave their camp site at the base of Mount Sinai. Unfortunately, the Israelites started to whine shortly afterward so God got angry and set them on fire until Moses prayed for God to stop immolating people.

The people started complaining again (right after having been set on fire) about their diet of "manna", desiring to eat meat again, and God sends them an over-abundance of quails (enough quails, as God says, that the Israelites will vomit meat "out of their nostrils" (Numbers 11:20) and grew tired of eating quails. Once the people began eating the quails though, God gets mad at them for doing so and smites them with a plague.

Meanwhile Moses' siblings Aaron and Miriam complain about Moses' Ethiopian wife, so God infects Miriam with leprosy (while Aaron gets out of punishment freely since he is the head priest) and argues that Moses is the "meekest man on earth". When Moses and Aaron beg God to reverse Miriam's leprosy, he agrees but under the stipulation that he'll only cure her after she remains exiled for seven days.

God has Moses sends out some spies to check out the "promised land", but becomes enraged when the spies discourage the people from invading the land because the land is inhabited by giants (the spies also bring home giant clusters of grapes). Except for the two dissenting spies, Caleb and Joshua, God kills off the rest of the spies with a plague for "slandering" the "promised land". When the people began complaining again, God wants to kill them all until Moses talks him out of it. God decides instead that none of them except for Caleb and Joshua will live to enter the "promised land" and decides to make the people of Israel wander around in the desert for forty years until the current generation dies off. The next day the Israelites decide to attempt to invade Canaan instead of God's insistence that they simply wander around in the desert, but because God doesn't help them in battle, they are chased off by the Canaanites and Amalekites.

After laying out some more laws on sacrificing animals, the Israelites see a man gathering sticks on the sabbath and God commands that they stone him to death. Afterward God also tells the Israelites to make fringes upon their garments attached with blue ribbons.

A group of over 250 men led by a man named Korah, wage a rebellion against Aaron and Moses' leadership. Moses dares the 250 men to light some "holy incense", and when they do just that, God sets them all on fire and then causes an earthquake to swallow up the rest of the men in the rebellion - along with their families. The Israelites complained about Moses and Aaron leading these men to their deaths, so God tells Moses and Aaron to move out of the way so that he can kill them all. God sends a plague, Aaron rushes to light some incense to appease God and stop the plague, but not before God has killed 14,700 people with his plague.

Moses and Aaron devise a "test" to prove their divine right to leadership - Moses has eleven of the twelve tribes sign their names on a stick while Aaron signs the twelfth, Moses puts the sticks in the tabernacle overnight - which only he, Aaron, and Aaron's sons are allowed to enter, and tells the Israelites that whomever's stick blooms with buds, flowers, and almonds the following day is the rightful leader of the Israelites. Of course Aaron wins the contest, and Moses puts Aaron's blossomed stick in the tabernacle as a reminder to the people to not question God's choice in leadership again.

After laying out some more rules and regulations regarding the Levites, God sends Moses and Aaron out to procure a red calf, that after being slaughtered and burned, its ashes are to be mixed in with "holy water" to form a "purification water" to purify people who've touched a corpse.

Moses' sister Miriam dies out in the desert, and the Israelites again find themselves without water. Moses and Aaron botch God's instructions for getting water out of a rock - despite the fact that 1) It worked and 2) they used the same technique that they used prior - and that neither Moses or Aaron shall live to set foot in the "promised land". The Israelites try to get the king of Edom (who were descended from Esau) to let them pass through their land, but the king sends his army to chase them away. They wind up at Mount Hor, where God decides to kill Aaron and appoints Eleazar to take over as the high priest.

The Israelites are then attacked by the Canaanites and some are taken prisoner. The people bargain with God, promising to destroy King Arad's cities if God would deliver the captive people back to the congregation - so the Canaanites and their cities were utterly destroyed, and the region was renamed to reflect that. The Israelites however got discouraged again, so God gets angry and retaliates by unleashing "fiery serpents" upon them. When the Israelites turn to Moses pleading for their lives, Moses forges a statue of a "fiery serpent" out of bronze, puts it on a pole, and tells the people that if they get bit by a snake, all they have to do is to look at Moses' statue and they won't die from their snakebites.

The Israelites requested passage through King Sihon's kingdom, and when he refused and attacked them, the Israelites defeated his army and took all of his cities. When the Israelites approached King Og's army, God tells them to do the exact same thing to King Og as they had done to King Sihon - they defeated his army, killed all of his people, leaving no survivors, and took his land.

King Balak, the king of Moab, fearing that his kingdom would be invaded and conquered by the Israelites as well, summoned a prophet named Balaam to come help him and to curse the Israelites. God initially refuses to let Balaam go, but relents and tells Balaam that he can go, so long as he follows God's instructions to a tee. However, when Balaam leaves the next morning, God gets angry with Balaam and sends an angel to hinder his journey. Only his donkey seems to see the angel blocking the way and the donkey tries to navigate around the angel, but gives up and lays down when the angel blocks a narrow path between two walls. After Balaam beats the donkey for disobeying him, the donkey talks to him and ask him what it had done to deserve such a beating. The angel finally reveals himself to Balaam and also asks why he had beaten the donkey. Balaam sees his mistake and the angel lets him pass, but he gets chewed out by King Balak for delaying his visit.

Balaam and King Balak sacrifice a bunch of animals, and Balaam receives a prophesy from God. However, God won't allow Balaam to curse the Israelites, and under God's instruction he blesses them instead much to the dismay of King Balak. King Balak tries again two more times before giving up in anger and disgust.

The Israelites are now seduced by the local Moabite women, and they coax them into worshiping their gods. God tells Moses to kill the leaders of the Israelites tribes and hang their corpses up in public view, as well as to kill everyone who worshiped any of the Moabite gods. An Israelite named Zimri however, snuck in a Midianite woman into the camp and Aaron's grandson Phinehas barged into their tent and impaled them both while they were copulating. Phinehas' handiwork apparently stopped one of God's plagues (which is never described, or is a reason given for it) which had killed 24,000 people. God rewards Phinehas with an "everlasting priesthood" for him and his descendants. He then tells Moses to "vex the Midianites" (despite the fact that his wife Zipporah and her family are Midianites), and blames them for the worshiping of other gods in Moab (even though the chapter specifies that it were Moabite women who led the Israelites astray).

Moses takes another census of all men fit to serve the military, and is told to divide up the "promised land" amongst the tribes, giving bigger pieces of land to the bigger tribes. However, a group of women demand property rights as their father had died and left behind no male heirs. God grants them property rights and allows for a man's daughter to inherit property (although she has to share it with her uncles) in the event of the man having no male heirs.

God then tells Moses that he will die once he has seen the "promised land" since he "rebelled" against God with the "striking the rock" incident. Moses asks God to pick a successor to lead the Israelites after his death, so God picks Joshua, and has Moses give Joshua a public ceremony to signify his leadership to the people.

God lays out even more demands for animal sacrifices, as well as establishing more animal sacrifices for various holidays. He also gives some rules about making vows, and how women's vows can be overruled by her father or her husband.

God now tells Moses to get revenge against the Midianites, and has him send the Israelites out to battle. The Israelites kill all of the men, but take the women and children prisoner, bringing them home along with all the valuables that they looted. Moses was furious that they had left anyone alive and ordered the troops to kill the women and male children, but stated that the soldiers could keep the female virgins for themselves. Moses exiles those soldiers who had come in contact with any dead bodies, or who were responsible for any killing, out of camp for seven days for "purification" and divides up the loot amongst the soldiers, the priests, the Levites, and the common people of Israel.

Upon their travels the tribes of Gad and Reuben convince a reluctant Moses that they'd rather take the nice cattle friendly land of Gilead than their inheritance in the "promised land". The tribes convince Moses to allow them to reside in Gilead providing they follow through on their military commitments to conquering Canaan and driving out the inhabitants currently residing in the "promised land" there. (The tribe of Manasseh also becomes allowed to reside in Gilead after they drive the inhabitants of Gilead out of the city.)

Moses has apparently been keeping a written record of the entire exodus, and is later told by God that every last Canaanite is to be driven out of the land, and that all of their images, statues, and altars are to be torn down and destroyed. Any Canaanite not driven out of the "promised land" will be a "thorn in the side" of the Israelites, and God will also do unto the Israelites what he "had thought to do" to the Canaanites.

God then sets the border lines for the "promised land" and appoints leaders from each tribe to assist in dividing up the land for each family. God also requires that the Levites are to be given a total of 48 cities (and surrounding suburb land) from the other tribes, and that six of these cities are to be "cities of refuge", where people who have accidentally killed someone can flee to safety away from their victim's family seeking revenge - but if the "revenger" finds them outside of the "city of refuge", then it's perfectly okay for them to kill the innocent person.

Finally, the book closes out with the clan of Gilead (from the tribe of Manasseh) complaining about a loophole in the property rights of the daughters from Chapter 27, and God amends his law to stipulate that if a man's daughters inherit land, they will only be allowed to marry within their own tribe - as otherwise the land would go to whichever tribe her husband belonged to.

NUMBERS: Chapter 31

Chapter 31
Summary:	God speaks to Moses telling him to seek vengeance upon the Midianites, and in turn Moses speaks to the people of Israel and tells them to arm themselves for war against the land of Midian. Moses commands that each tribe of Israel conscripts 1,000 soldiers to send to war. Moses sent them to war - a thousand from every tribe - led by Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, carrying "holy instruments" and trumpets. The Israelites battled the Midianites and slew all of the males. They slew the five kings of Midian - Evi, Rekem, Zur, Hur, and Reba - as well as Balaam the prophet who they slew with the sword. The Israelites took all of the Midianite women and children captive; took the spoils of their cattle, flocks, and goods; and burnt their cities and castles to the ground. The Israelite soldiers brought the captives and their war spoils before Moses and Eleazar, and before the congregation of the people of Israel camped on the plains of Moab by the Jordan River near Jericho. Moses however was angry with the officers of the army which emerged from battle. Moses asked them why they had let the Midianite women live, stating that these are the very women that followed Balaam's advice and committed trespass against God in the matter of Peor and caused God to send a plague amongst the Israelites*. Moses tells them: 31:17 "Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him." Moses adds that they are to keep all of the virgin female children ("that have not known a man by lying with him") for themselves. Moses instructs that anyone who had killed a person in battle or had touched a dead body must reside outside of the camp for seven days, purifying themselves and their captives on the third and seventh days. Also to be purified are all garments and anything made from leather, goat's hair, or wood. Eleazar then spoke to the soldiers, speaking an ordinance of the law of which God gave to Moses. He tells the soldiers that every metal that can withstand fire - gold, silver, brass, iron, tin, and lead - shall be passed through fire to purify it, and then further purified with the "water of separation". Anything that cannot withstand the flames must be purified with the water alone. He finishes by telling them to wash their clothes on the seventh day, and they shall then be "clean" and allowed to return to the camp. God then speaks to Moses telling him and Eleazar to take a total of all of the spoils the soldiers had looted - both people and animal - and divide them into two parts. Half is to go to the soldiers, and half is to go to the rest of the people of Israel. He tells Moses further, that the half belonging to the soldiers is to be taxed - where one out of every 500 captive, ox, donkey, and sheep is to "belong to God" and is to be given to Eleazar for a "heave offering". Out of the half belonging to the people of Israel, one portion out of fifty (2 percent) is to be given to the Levites who keep charge of the tabernacle. Moses and Eleazar did as God commanded, and the total booty was: 675,000 sheep 72,000 oxen 61,000 donkeys 32,000 young virgin girls The half given to the army: 337,500 sheep (of which 675 were given to Eleazar) 36,000 oxen (of which 72 were given to Eleazar) 30,500 donkeys (of which 61 were given to Eleazar) 16,000 virgin girls (32 of which were "God's portion"*) The half given to the people of Israel: 337,500 sheep (of which 6750 were given to the Levites) 36,000 oxen (of which 720 were given to the Levites) 30,500 donkeys (of which 610 were given to the Levites) 16,000 virgin girls (of which 320 were given to the Levites) The officers and battalion leaders came to Moses and told him that all of the men that had been sent to war had been accounted for, and that not a single one of them had been killed or is missing. Therefore the officers brought a tribute from their spoils consisting of gold jewelry, chains, bracelets, rings, earrings, and necklaces, in order to "make atonement for their souls". Moses and Eleazar took the jewelry from the military leaders and found its value to be worth 16,750 shekels. Moses and Eleazar took the gold to the tabernacle for a memorial for the people of Israel before God.
Notes:	1.) According to Numbers Chapter 25 it was the Moabite women not the Midianite women who were responisble for the incident at Mount Peor. 2.) It is unclear whether the 32 virgins became human sacrifices, or were given to the Levites to rape.
Thoughts:	Apparently God isn't through with the Midianites after their last encounter with the people of Israel in Chapter 25 and tells Moses that he wants to seek revenge on them. He tells Moses to mobilize an army to attack the Midianites in their home land. Moses gathers 1,000 troops from each tribe and sends them to war, appointing Phinehas (Eleazar's son who brutally killed an Israelite for bringing a Midianite woman into the camp, impaling them both together with a spear) to lead the armies with his "holy instruments" and trumpets. The Israelites triumphed in battle and slew all of the males, including the five kings of Midian, and even the prophet Balaam - although the fate of his talking donkey is uncertain. The Israelites took all of the Midianite women and children captive and looted their cattle, flocks, and goods before burning their cities and castles to the ground. The Israelite soldiers returned to camp and were met by Moses and Eleazar in the plains of Moab. Moses however was furious with the officers of the army when he found that they had let the Midianite women live stating that they had "commit[ted] trespass against the Lord in the matter of Peor", causing a plague amongst the Israelites. This is not corroborated by the story in Numbers Chapter 25 as it appears in the bible. The bible clearly implicates the Moabite women in the "matter of Peor", and the "cause" of the plague is not specified at all - only that Phineas' slaying of a Midianite woman caused the plague to stop - after killing 24,000 Israelites. It's also not explained as to how or whether Balaam encouraged the women to "commit trespass" to begin with. Moses follows this up with perhaps one of the most vile and immoral verses contained in the bible: 31:17 "Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him." The verse that follows actually more repulsive and disgusting: 31:18 "But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.." What Moses is saying here is for the soldier to kill every woman and male child - except for the virgin girls which the soldiers can keep for themselves. Yes, this is the same Moses whom the bible describes as the "meekest man on earth", stating that it's okay to murder women and children prisoners of war, unless you find some virgin girls amongst the bunch, then you can keep them for yourself as sex partners against their will. These two verse are so appalling and inexcusable that I had to go searching for some apologetic answers to them, to which I will be following up and rebutting in the following post. There is simply no way to excuse these two verses as anything but barbaric, disgusting, and immoral, there is just no context in which that behavior can be justified - period. Moses then makes every soldier who killed in battle or touched a corpse reside outside of the camp for a week to purify themselves, reminding them that they'd have to purify themselves and their captives (i.e. the virgin girls they were allowed to rape keep for themselves) on the third and seventh days. They would also have to purify all garments and anything made from leather, goat's hair, or wood. Eleazar then addresses the soldiers, telling them that any metal that they looted that can withstand fire will have to be passed through flames to purify it, and then further be purified with the bizarre "water of separation" ritual described in Numbers Chapter 19. Anything that can't withstand flame will simply have to be washed in the "water of separation" alone. He finished up by telling the soldiers to wash their clothes on the seventh day of their exile, and that they'll be "clean" and allowed to return to the camp after that. God then tells Moses and Eleazar to count up all of the spoils that the soldiers looted from the Midianites and to divide them up in half. One half is to go to the soldiers who did the looting, and the other is to go to the people of Israel, but before Moses ponies out the riches, God wants his cut. He taxes the soldiers cut a mere .20% - where one out of every 500 ox, donkey, sheep, or virgin is to "belong to God" - or more aptly, is given to Eleazar for a "heave offering". Out of the people's half, a 2% tax is levied upon them with the spoils going to the Levites. The bible gives us the totals of each half's take (675,000 sheep; 72,000 oxen; 61,000 donkeys; and 32,000 virgin girls) and what percentages are "God's portion" - where curiously it isn't explained what happens to the virgins in "God's portion". Priests are forbidden from marrying foreign women, so they couldn't have become Eleazar's concubines, so either they were just passed off for others to rape or they might have been human sacrifices(?) - the bible isn't clear here. The military leaders then decide to present Moses and Eleazar with a donation to the tabernacle of some of the gold jewelry they had looted, pointing out that not a single soldier was lost or killed in battle. Moses and Eleazar happily took the 16,750 shekels worth of gold and stashed it inside the tabernacle for a memorial for the people of Israel before God.

NUMBERS: Who is Agag?

In Numbers: Chapter 24 during one of Balaam's prophecies a curious name is mentioned in verse 7:

24:7 "...and his king shall be higher than Agag...

Who is Agag? The answer is a rather complicated one, considering a king named Agag shows up much later in the book of 1 Samuel, which is five books away from where we currently are here in the book of Numbers when Balaam makes his prophecy.

We're left to deduce one of the following explanations:

1. Balaam predicted Agag long before his birth and reign:	Extremely unlikely
The simplest of explanations is also the most faulty. Regardless of the supernatural, mystical, and miraculous claims in the bible we'd still have a lot to explain to make this explanation fit. The first thing we would have to assume is that either God or Balaaam possessed the power to make a precisely accurate prediction right down to a person's name and their occupation - as well as an assessment of their work - many years before they were born. This would be the equivalent to predicting "Peter Millicent, one of the greatest presidents of all time, will become the president of the U.S. in the year 2412". However, within the context of how Balaam's prophecy is delivered I would have to make my prediction as so: "Your neighbor Fred will become a greater leader than Peter Millicent". Obviously, you would have no clue as to who I was referring to when I mentioned Peter Millicent, unless either you could see into the future yourself (thereby negating me having to tell you this prediction), or if I had told you previously who Peter Millicent would be. The problem with the latter point is that our only reference point is the bible, which doesn't support or refute that the name Agag was well known to be a predicted future leader, so we'd simply be making an assumption. If for the sake of argument, we assume that either Balaam or God did predict a great leader named Agag, we would have to assume one of two things. Either this was a self-fulfilling prophecy, meaning that people would possibly name their children Agag in the hopes that their child would become this great leader, or we're faced with the idea that there is no such thing as free will - God would have to know exactly how everything would turn out before it happens. This would mean that he knew everything that would happen, how it would unfold, beginning from the creation myth, leaving nothing up to free will. Agag's parents wouldn't be able to change their mind and not have children, nor would the parents be able to pick a different name for Agag. Pretty much we've created a logical paradox which simply doesn't fit. The next problem we have with this explanation is that it doesn't make sense within the context of the story. Balaam was speaking to King Balak when he made this prophecy, his main intent being to tell the king how great of a nation the Israelites were and how they would conquer and dominate the land. Unless King Balak was familiar with the name Agag, mentioning this name would be meaningless to him. Again, it would be like walking up to someone on the street and telling them that they'd be a better leader than "Peter Millicent". You would probably get a puzzled look and perhaps a question asking who Peter Millicent is. If you were in the midst of a long statement to someone else, interjecting the name of a person that you would have to explain to your listener would only derail the delivery of your statement.
2. Agag is actually a title and not a proper name	Unsupported
Another common theory, which on face value seems far more plausible, is that "Agag" was actually a title - like "king" or "pharaoh" - rather than a proper name. This certainly would clear up the inconsistency of King Balak being familiar with the name "Agag", as both a contemporary leader as well as the character from 1 Samuel could easily both hold this title. The only problem with this theory is that there's nothing to support coming to this conclusion that "Agag" is a title. This would be analogous of someone unfamiliar with U.S. history noting upon seeing an incomplete list, that we've had several U.S. Presidents and Vice Presidents named "George" (Washington and both Bush presidencies, along with VP's George Clinton and George M. Dallas) and assuming that "George" must be a title. It's simply making an "educated guess" based on an assumption, there isn't any further evidence to suggest that "Agag" is a title anymore than someone assuming that "George" must be a title upon hearing that three of our presidents and two of our vice presidents shared that first name. Which leads me to our next possibility...
3. Agag was a common name in the area	Plausible, but unsupported
The next explanation is the thought that perhaps Agag was a common name in either the area, the time period, or perhaps both. While this is certainly a more plausible explanation than the first two possibilities, there are problems with this argument. First, like the argument that "Agag" could be a title, there's no evidence to support that Agag was a common name. However, a counter argument could be that much like the modern papacy, sometimes rulers will rename themselves to take on the legacy of a former ruler, or in the case of a monarchy ruling from a royal lineage it could be possible that their offspring were named after former great leaders in their ancestry. Again, this is certainly a more sound explanation than the previous arguments, but again there is no evidence to support that this is the case. The main issue against this argument is that "Agag" is mentioned in a manner as though the reader of the bible should be familiar with the name, and considering that Agag is only mentioned once here in the book of Numbers and then later on in 1 Samuel. This, along with the context that Balaam is also giving a prophecy here, leads us to another possibility.
4. The reference to Agag was added to the story in Numbers to strengthen the notion of prophecy.	Plausible, but unconfirmed
In order to understand the motive behind dropping in the name "Agag" into Balaam's prophecy after the fact, we have to revisit our first argument - the belief that Balaam somehow predicted the name of a ruler long before he was born. In the context of the story itself, we'd still be left with the same problem - how would King Balak know who Balaam was referring to? However, the significance of the name "Agag" would actually be more for the benefit of the reader, rather than King Balak. The whole premise behind most of the bible's mythology is prediction and prophecy (Jesus' birth and divinity is supposedly predicted by the Hebrew texts, Jesus' prediction that he will be betrayed by one of his disciples, Joseph predicts the Egyptian famine leading to his gaining favor with the pharaoh of Egypt, and the entire book of Revelations consisting entirely of prophecy). One of the major tenements to the concept of "truth" to believers mainly rests on the belief that the bible has predicted a great many things accurately. Jesus' divinity was primarily accepted on the premise that he fulfilled the various requirements of Jewish prophecy concerning the messiah. Without those prerequisites, it's possible that his alleged miracles may have been condemned as sorcery or witchcraft, rather than an example of his divinity. The point being that accurate prophecy is a strong core of the Judeo-Christian belief system. Therefore, that is certainly a motivating factor to make it appear that Balaam's prediction not only covered what we could assume was already inevitable (the Israelites conquering their enemies) but to also add in a prediction that none but a omniscient God would be privy to claim - predicting a strong leader who has yet to be born. In this context, mentioning Agag is more for the benefit of the reader to confirm that God has accurately predicted the coming of a person yet to exist. Agag plays such a significant role as a character who is viciously torn apart in the book of Samuel as an act of vengeance against the Amalekites, that it is impossible to overlook his casual mention here in Balaam's prophecy. In the context of our story, the mention of Agag doesn't appear to make sense as related to King Balak, but it makes a definite impact upon those reading the bible who are familiar with Agag's infamous role in the book of Samuel. While there is no concrete certainty to this argument, there is certainly motivation, and on this premise alone it's something we cannot overlook as a possibility.

While we simply can't come up with a definitive answer as to who Agag is within the context of Numbers: Chapter 24, the literalist answers simply don't add up and can only be explained away by guess work. Although we also cannot say with certainty that Agag was inserted into Balaam's prophecy after the fact, there certainly is a likely motivation for doing so. The most obvious explanations often are the most likely, especially when combined with a strong motivational factor.

NUMBERS: Chapter 24

Chapter 24
Summary:	Balaam realized that God was only going to bless the Israelites, so unlike the previous two times that he ascended the mountains to seek "enchantments" with God, he instead turned to face the wilderness. Balaam lifted his gaze and saw the people of Israel dwelling in their tents, organized by their tribes, and at that moment the spirit of God came to him with another message for King Balak. Balaam delivered this message to the king: 24:3 "...the man whose eyes are open hath said: 24:4 He hath said, which heard the words of God, which saw the vision of the Almighty, falling into a trance, but having his eyes open: 24:5 How goodly are thy tents, O Jacob, and thy tabernacles, O Israel! 24:6 As the valleys are they spread forth, as gardens by the river's side, as the trees of lign aloes which the LORD hath planted, and as cedar trees beside the waters. 24:7 He shall pour the water out of his buckets, and his seed shall be in many waters, and his king shall be higher than Agag, and his kingdom shall be exalted. 24:8 God brought him forth out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn: he shall eat up the nations his enemies, and shall break their bones, and pierce them through with his arrows. 24:9 He couched, he lay down as a lion, and as a great lion: who shall stir him up? Blessed is he that blesseth thee, and cursed is he that curseth thee." King Balak became angry with Balaam, "smote his hands together", and exclaimed that he had summoned Balaam to curse the king's enemies, yet Balaam had instead just blessed them three times in a row. He tells Balaam to leave and return back to his land, adding that he had intended to bestow a great honor upon Balaam, but that God had apparently kept him back from that honor. Balaam replied, just as he had said to the king's messengers, that even if he was given a palace filled with silver and gold, he still would be unable to go against God's commandments. He tells the king that he will return home, but not before telling him what the Israelites will do to his people. Balaam tells the king: 24:15 "...Balaam the son of Beor hath said, and the man whose eyes are open hath said: 24:16 He hath said, which heard the words of God, and knew the knowledge of the most High, which saw the vision of the Almighty, falling into a trance, but having his eyes open: 24:17 I shall see him, but not now: I shall behold him, but not nigh: there shall come a Star out of Jacob, and a Sceptre shall rise out of Israel, and shall smite the corners of Moab, and destroy all the children of Sheth. 24:18 And Edom shall be a possession, Seir also shall be a possession for his enemies; and Israel shall do valiantly. 24:19 Out of Jacob shall come he that shall have dominion, and shall destroy him that remaineth of the city." Balaam shifted his gaze over toward the land of Amalek and continued: 24:20 "...Amalek was the first of the nations; but his latter end shall be that he perish for ever." Balaam then shifted his gaze toward the land of the Kenites and said: 24:21 "...Strong is thy dwellingplace, and thou puttest thy nest in a rock. 24:22 Nevertheless the Kenite shall be wasted, until Asshur shall carry thee away captive." Balaam concluded his prophecy saying: 24:23 "...Alas, who shall live when God doeth this! 24:24 And ships shall come from the coast of Chittim, and shall afflict Asshur, and shall afflict Eber, and he also shall perish for ever." Balaam then rose up and returned home, and King Balak did the same.
Thoughts:	Balaam realizing that God simply isn't going to allow him to curse the Israelites, and will instead bless them, decides not to ascend to a "high place" in order to speak with God. Instead he gazed out towards the wilderness, seeing the Israelites and their well organized campsite. Although Balaam it seems was trying to avoid another message from God, God gave him one anyways and Balaam returned to deliver the message to King Balak. Balaam gives a prophetic message to the king which in summary basically details how blessed the Israelites are, and that they are destined to conquer the lands of the "promised land". In Balaam's speech however, he curiously mentions that "their (the Israelites) king will be greater than Agag". Who is Agag? The answer is complicated considering a king named Agag shows up much later in the book of 1 Samuel, which is five books away from where we currently are here in the book of Numbers. I've decided to tackle this question in a separate post so as to not deviate away from the rest of Numbers Chapter 24. The King James bible also humorously compares the strength of the Israelites to "the strength of an(sic) unicorn", however the NIV bible replaces this translation with "the strength of a wild ox". King Balak, however, is not pleased to once again hear God's message of his blessing the Israelites coming from Balaam - the man he summoned to curse the Israelites. He tells Balaam to take a hike and go back to his own land, while telling him that he blew his chance at receiving a great honor from the king, because God apparently held him back from it. Balaam replied that he's been upfront all along with the king, stating that he even told the messengers that even if he was offered a palace filled with silver and gold that he wouldn't be able to go against God's wishes. Before Balaam departs for home, he gives King Balak another prophecy about what the Israelites are going to do to his kingdom. Balaam tells the king that there shall come a star out from the people of Israel, and that the ruler of the Israelites will "smite the corners of Moab" and destroy the descendants of Sheth. He continues on stating that the Israelites will possess the city of Edom, while their enemies will possess the city of Seir - until the Israelites conquer and destroy those remaining in the city. Balaam also predicts doom for the Amalekites, and states that while the Kenites are situated in a strong threshold, they too will be destroyed, until King Asshur (of Assyria) carries the survivors away as captives. Balaam concludes his prophecy by stating that ships will arrive from the coast of Chittim, and will oppress both Asshur and Eber, and they too shall perish. Balaam and King Balak both departed and went home.

NUMBERS: Chapter 23

Chapter 23
Summary:	Balaam now asks King Balaak to build him seven* altars, and to prepare him seven* oxen and seven* rams for animal sacrifices. The king did as Balaam requested, and King Balak and Balaam sacrificed animals on all seven altars they had built. Balaam tells the king to stand by the "burnt offering" while he goes to speak with God. He tells King Balak that he will return and tell the king whatever God decides to show him. Balaam then goes to a "high place", and God met Balaam there. Balaam tells God that he has prepared seven* altars, and that he has slaughtered a bull and a ram on each one. God then "put a word in Balaam's mouth" and tells him to return to King Balak and deliver the message. When Balaam returned, he found King Balak standing by the burnt sacrifices with all the princes of Moab. Balaam then relayed the message he was given by God: 23:7 ..."Balak the king of Moab hath brought me from Aram, out of the mountains of the east, saying, Come, curse me Jacob, and come, defy Israel. 23:8 How shall I curse, whom God hath not cursed? or how shall I defy, whom the LORD hath not defied? 23:9 For from the top of the rocks I see him, and from the hills I behold him: lo, the people shall dwell alone, and shall not be reckoned among the nations. 23:10 Who can count the dust of Jacob, and the number of the fourth part of Israel? Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end be like his!" King Balak admonished Balaam, exclaiming that he had brought him to Moab to curse the Israelites, and not to have Balaam bless them. Balaam replied that he must heed to what God has instructed him to say. King Balak decides to bring Balaam to another location where he would see more clearly the people of Israel. Again, they set up seven* altars, sacrificing a bull and a ram on each, this time upon the top of Mount Pisgah located in the field of Zophim. Like before, Balaam tells King Balak to wait by the "burnt offerings" while he goes off to convene with God. God meets with Balaam and again "puts a word in his mouth" to say to King Balak. When Balaam returned, the king - standing by his "burnt offering" with the princes of Moab - asked Balaam what God had said. Balaam replied with the following message: 23:18 ..."Rise up, Balak, and hear; hearken unto me, thou son of Zippor: 23:19 God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good? 23:20 Behold, I have received commandment to bless: and he hath blessed; and I cannot reverse it. 23:21 He hath not beheld iniquity in Jacob, neither hath he seen perverseness in Israel: the LORD his God is with him, and the shout of a king is among them. 23:22 God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn. 23:23 Surely there is no enchantment against Jacob, neither is there any divination against Israel: according to this time it shall be said of Jacob and of Israel, What hath God wrought! 23:24 Behold, the people shall rise up as a great lion, and lift up himself as a young lion: he shall not lie down until he eat of the prey, and drink the blood of the slain." King Balak tried to compromise with Balaam, telling him that if he's not going to curse the Israelites, at least don't bless them. But Balaam argued that whatever God had spoken, he was obliged to follow. King Balak decides to give it one more shot to try to convince Balaam (and God) to curse the Israelites, bringing him to the top of Mount Peor overlooking the desert of Jeshimon. Again, Balaam requested King Balak to build seven* altars to sacrifice animals upon, and King Balak once again did so and sacrificed a bull and a ram on each altar.
Notes:	1.) Yet more mystical significance of the number seven in the bible.
Thoughts:	Our adventures with King Balak and his prophet friend Balaam (who also happens to have a talking donkey) continue with the king's desire to have Balaam (and by proxy, God) curse the Israelites, whom he fears are poised to invade his land. In order to consult with God over the matter, Balaam asks the king to build him seven (again, with that mystical number) altars, and to prepare seven bulls and rams for animal sacrificing - one of each animal is to be sacrificed on each of the seven altars. (I can't help but imagine in a humorous way that this must somehow be the bronze age equivalent of using a payphone to dial up "God's hotline".) After King Balak and the princes of Moab slaughter up some animals to place the call, Balaam tells them to wait where they are while Balaam goes to speak with God in private in a "high place" (which seems to indicate that our story is taking place in mountainous terrain). Although it isn't specified whether God speaks to Balaam face to face as he does with Moses (my guess would be that he doesn't), it appears rather strange and suspicious that Balaam follows a similar methodology of climbing a mountain (or a similar "high place") in order to speak with God. I find this methodology suspicious due to the following factors: if Balaam, like Moses and Aaron, were to deceive people into believing that they were speaking to God when in fact they weren't, the "need for privacy" by climbing a mountain would seem to serve to reduce the risk of being observed, more so than perhaps simply taking a walk in the desert. It would therefore appear that "climbing a mountain" or "going to a high place" would serve to benefit Balaam (as well as Moses and Aaron) in keeping such a deception without being observed, considering that God does not require a person to be on top of a mountain in order to speak with him. God also does not require a person to be secluded away from others when speaking to people directly (God speaks to Moses and Aaron numerous times while they are in the midst of the congregation of Israelites). Anyways, on top of the "high place" God "put[s] a word into Balaam's mouth" which he repeats to King Balak upon his return. Balaam's message explains that he cannot justify cursing a people that God has not cursed himself (which - considering all of the plagues, leprosy, and immolation God has bestowed upon the Israelites - is quite arguable to the contrary), and that he cannot defy whom God has not defied (again, quite arguable, considering that God has to be talked out of utterly annihilating them time and time again, not to mention that he won't let any of the current generation of Israelites - save Joshua and Caleb - inherit the "promised land", instead having them march around in the desert for forty years until they all die off). Balaam continues, telling the king that he has seen the Israelites from high upon this mountain, and that they dwell alone and shall be distinct among the nations of the world. He tells the king that the people of Jacob (Israel) are as numerous as particles of dust, and that he would like to die a righteous death like Jacob. I find this rather odd the mention of Israel's former name of Jacob, and the loose interchangeable usage of both names between Balaam and King Balak. Perhaps we are supposed to assume that the details of Israel's life were so legendary that they were known widely to other civilizations 400 years after his death, but I find this very difficult to accept. Our modern leaders probably have very little knowledge about the history of other countries from 400 years ago, especially a trivial bit of information like the former name of a historical figure. Almost as of it were a Monty Python sketch, upon hearing this message, the king exclaimed that he had summoned Balaam to Moab to curse the Israelites, not to have Balaam bless them. Balaam offers up a response asking if he's supposed to not take heed to the message God has sent him. King Balak then seems to think that if Balaam gets a better view of the Israelites from a new and different location, then perhaps he might change his mind and agree to curse them. King Balak also might not be the bible's best example of brilliance either, but that's to be expected from "bad guy" characters in the bible. The king now drags Balaam through the field of Zophim and atop Mount Pisgah, and again sets up seven altars to sacrifice seven bulls and rams upon - again, one bull and one ram per each altar. Balaam tells King Balak to wait by the smoldering animal carcasses while he ascends the mountain to get his instructions from God. Once again, God "puts a word in [Balaam's] mouth", and Balaam returns to deliver his message to the king. Balaam's new message says the following, which is riddled with questionable claims: Claim Validity "God is not a man..." True "...that he should lie..." (meaning: God doesn't lie) Debatable (While we haven't encountered a direct bold face lie so far, we have read various passages with God clearly being deceptive or not completely up front and forthright.) "...neither the son of man..." Debatable / True (This is true in the context of our story, but debatable in the real world, where some can assert that God, and the concept of God, is in fact "man made".) "(neither the son of man) that he should repent;" (meaning: God doesn't repent) False Exodus 32:14 clearly states: "And the Lord repented of the evil which he thought to do unto his people"; and while we can't be completely certain about God's true motivations, it is also stated in Genesis 6:6 that God has regrets about having created man; in both Genesis chapters 8 & 9 God promises never to commit mass genocide again, sealing said promise symbolically with a rainbow. "hath he said, and shall he not do it?" (meaning: has he said something and not done it? In other words, God doesn't change his mind) False God clearly has changed his mind twice, once in Exodus Chapter 32 where his intent was to kill off all of the Israelites for worshiping Aaron's golden calf, until Moses talks him out of it; and secondly in Numbers Chapter 14 when he once again wished to kill all of the Israelites, until Moses again talked him out of it, where God instead decided to simply allow them to die out in the desert over the next 40 years. "hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?" (meaning: has he claimed to do something and not follow through. In other words, God doesn't lie) Debatable / True While it could be argued that God promised land to Abraham, Jacob, and the Israelites and did not follow through in their lifetimes, the Israelites eventually do take over the lands God "promised" them. It may have been centuries later than from when God first issued his promise, but we can't technically call this a lie. "He hath not beheld iniquity in Jacob" (meaning: God has not seen "sin" in Jacob) Debatable Largely dependent on whether "Jacob" is referring to solely Jacob himself, or to his descendants the Israelites. The Israelites themselves have sinned numerous times. While Jacob was not specifically accused of "sinning" by God, there are many acts Jacob committed that are seen as "sinful", or at the very least, unethical behavior: Jacob deceives his brother Esau into selling his "birth right" for a bowl of soup Jacob deceives his father into blessing him with his stolen "birth right" from his older brother Esau, by serving him his favorite meal (which he had asked Esau to do), by dressing up in Esau's clother, and by simulating his body hair with goat skin. Jacob marries two sisters, Rachel and Leah (who are also his first cousins) which God specifically forbids in Leviticus Chapter 18 Jacob deceives his Uncle Laban, his employer, by manipulating the breeding of his flocks to produce animals that he was allowed to keep, in order to amass his own wealth. Showed favoritism towards his son Joseph, and "loved him more" Was willing to let his son Simeon remain falsely imprisoned out of paranoia for the welfare of his youngest son, Benjamin. His motivation being that Benjamin was the only son he had left from his "favorite" wife. "...neither hath he seen perverseness in Israel..." False Regardless of whether "Israel" is referring to Jacob or his descendants, both have committed acts that God has deemed perverse. The Israelites with the "golden calf" incident, and Jacob with his marriage to two sisters, which God forbids in Leviticus Chapter 18 Balaam finishes off his message by stating that God is with the Israelites, and has brought them out of Egypt with the strength of a "unicorn". No curse nor "magic spells" are to be performed against the Israelites, and that they will simply observe the Israelites conquer other lands violently - as a lion would eat its prey and "drink the blood of the slain". Upon hearing the message, King Balak pleads that if Balaam will not curse the Israelites, at least don't bless them! Balaam however, insists that he is bound to do whatever God commands him to do. The king again shows his stupidity by not being convinced that this is an unwinnable situation, and gets Balaam to try again - this time on top of Mount Peor. Balaam again has the king construct seven altars and to sacrifice a bull and a ram on each of them.

NUMBERS: Chapter 22

Chapter 22
Summary:	The people of Israel traveled on, camping in the plains of Moab, east of the Jordan River by Jericho. King Balak, the son of Zippor and king of Moab, had seen what the people of Israel had done to the Amorites, and his kingdom became scared and distressed by the large amount of people in the Israeli army. Balak spoke with the elders of Midian, voicing his fears that the Israelites would "lick up all that are around" them, "as an ox licketh up the grass of the field". The king then sent messengers to Balaam, the son of Beor, living in the land of Pethor near the Euphrates River. He summoned Balaam explaining that these people who have come out from Egypt (the Israelites) are beginning to cover the face of the earth, and that they are against him. King Balak begged Balaam to come to Moab and curse the Israelites and drive them out of the land, as they were too mighty for his armies to repel. King Balak was aware of the blessings that fall upon all that Balaam has blessed, and the doom that falls all that Balaam has cursed. The messengers that delivered the message were amongst the elders of Moab and Midian, and came bearing a reward of money as they delivered King Balak's message to Balaam. Balaam told the messengers to stay for the night and that he would speak with them again after speaking with God. God came to Balaam and asked who these men were that were staying with him, to which Balaam replied that they were sent by King Balak of Moab. Balaam repeated to God what the king had said to him, about a horde of people who had come out of Egypt and that he had been asked to curse them in the hopes that it would drive them out of the land. God tells Balaam that he is not to go with these messengers, nor is he to curse the people, for they are blessed. Balaam awoke in the morning and told the messengers to return to their land, as God had refused to allow him to leave with them. The messengers returned to King Balak and told him that Balaam refused to come with them. King Balak sent another group of messengers consisting of even more noble leaders than the last, and they went to Balaam begging him to return to Moab with them. The messengers told Balaam that the king has promised to bestow a great honor upon him and whatever reward he chooses. Balaam answered the men stating that even if the king had offered his palace filled with silver and gold, that he would still be unable to to go against God's word. Balaam tells the men to stay the night and that he will again speak with God to see if he had anything further to say. God again came to Balaam that night and told him that if these men came to summon him, then he shall go with them, but tells Balaam that he is to only do what God tells him to do. Balaam awoke the next morning, saddled his donkey, and went with the princes of Moab. God became angry because Balaam went with the messengers (despite having commanded him to go with them the previous evening) and placed an angel in his way to stand as an adversary against him. Balaam was riding his donkey, along with his two servants, when the donkey saw the angel standing in the way with a sword drawn in its hand. The donkey turned aside out of the way and went into the field, so Balaam beat her to get her back on the path. The angel stood in a path in the vineyards between two walls, and the donkey seeing the angel thrust herself against the wall crushing Balaam's foot against the wall, so Balaam beat her again. The angel then moved ahead further to a more narrow space where there would be no room for the donkey to turn right or left. When the donkey saw the angel, she fell down under Balaam. Balaam became angry and beat the donkey again with his staff. God then "opened the mouth" of the donkey, and the donkey said to Balaam, "What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times?" Balaam replied to his donkey that he beat her because the donkey had mocked him. He added that if he was armed with a sword that he would have killed her. The donkey then asked Balaam if she had not served him well until this day, and had she ever done anything like this before, to which Balaam conceded that she had not. God "opened the eyes" of Balaam, and he then saw the angel standing in the way with its sword drawn. Balaam bowed down his head and "fell on his face". The angel asked Balaam why had he beaten the donkey three times and stated that it stood in Balaam's way because his actions were "perverse". The angel explained that the donkey had seen and turned from the angel three times, and that if she hadn't the angel surely would have slain Balaam while sparing the life of his donkey. Balaam then told the angel that he had "sinned" because he was unaware that the angel was standing in the way against him. He then tells the angel that he will turn around and head back if he has displeased the angel. The angel tells Balaam to go with Balak's messengers, but to only say what he is told to say by God. Balaam went with the messengers, and when King Balak heard that Balaam was coming, he went out to greet him at a city in Moab, on the border of the Arnon River. King Balak then asked Balaam why he had delayed his coming, and why his offers of reward had not motivated him to come sooner. Balaam responds by saying that although he has came, he is no power to say anything except what God tells him to speak. Balaam then went with King Balak to Kirjathhuzoth, where the king sacrificed oxen and sheep, giving the animals to Balaam and the messengers that were with him. The following morning, King Balak brought Balaam to the top of Mount Baal, where he could see the people of Israel spread out before him.
Thoughts:	This chapter introduces us to the king of Moab, King Balak, who is fearing the growing army of the people of Israel after seeing what they had done to the Amorites. King Balaak sends some dignitaries down to a prophet named Balaam, who lived in the land of Pethor near the Euphrates River. The king tries to summoned Balaam, explaining his fear of his kingdom being conquered by the Israelites, and asks Balaam - who he knows has favor with God - to curse them, in order to drive them away from the land of Moab. Balaam tells the messengers to stay for the night and that he would speak with God that evening and give them an answer in the morning. That night God visits with Balaam and says something curious, he asks Balaam who these men are that are visiting. Most believers attribute omniscience and omnipresence as characteristics to Yahweh, but clearly here he is shown to be ignorant towards the identities of Balaam's visitors. If God is an omniscient being he would know who these men were, and if he was omnipresent, he would have seen King Balak send these men. Obviously, this chapter is yet another example that God is not quite as omniscient and omnipresent as he is commonly described as. Balaam then has to explain to God (in spite of God's alleged omniscience and omnipresence) who these men are, and repeats the message they delivered from King Balak. God tells Balaam that he is not to go with these messengers, nor is he to curse the Israelites, as he explains to Balaam that they are blessed people. In the morning Balaam tells the messengers that he cannot accompany them as God has refused it, and sends the messengers back home. Upon the messengers returning without Balaam, King Balak now sends a second group of messengers comprised of higher nobility to beg Balaam to come back and curse the Israelites promising Balaam whatever reward he wishes. When the second group of messengers arrive, Balaam tells them that even if the king gave him a palace filled with silver and gold, he would still be unable to go against God's orders. He has the men to spend the night and tells them that he will speak with God again and will see if God has anything further to say about the matter. Again, God speaks to Balaam that night and tells him that he's allowed to travel back with the men, but that he is only to say and do what God tells him to do. The next morning Balaam saddles his donkey and went with the messengers, and God gets angry with Balaam for leaving with them. This seems puzzling, considering that God gave Balaam permission the previous evening, but it is thought that Balaam's eagerness is what angers God, despite that the bible does not imply this at all. The way this chapter reads, it appears that God changes his mind about Balaam leaving with the men and gets angry with Balaam for leaving, which is not any fault on Balaam's part. So God places an angel armed with a sword along the path that Balaam is traveling. Balaam's donkey sees the angel armed with a sword and turns off of the path heading off into a field. Balaam angry at the donkey leaving the path beats the donkey until it returns back to the path. The angel then moves farther up the path between two walls in a vineyard. The donkey again sees the angel armed with a sword and tries to squeeze tightly against the wall to avoid the angel, in the process crushing Balaam's foot against the wall. Balaam once again beats the donkey to correct it's path. Once again the angel moved farther up the path to an area leaving no room for the donkey to maneuver around it. When the donkey saw the angel blocking the path, the donkey lay down. Balaam became furious and beat the donkey a third time with his staff. God then makes the donkey talk which for some reason doesn't seem to alarm Balaam at all. Now we've read a lot of crazy stuff so far, and while this isn't the first time we've encountered talking animals, I have to admit that this is probably one of the silliest and most far fetched things we've encountered thus far. I understand that the bible can be taken many different ways. More sensible people tend to interpret a lot of the sillier verses in the bible to be taken more along the lines of parables, and that the focus is to teach a story with exaggerated flourishes. However, there are also quite a few people who believe that the bible is "inerrable fact", (some even going so far as to suggest that the bible is somehow a "history book") including our tale here about Balaam's talking donkey. The mental gymnastics one would have to perform to justify the belief that Balaam's talking donkey was an actual historical event is just mind boggling to me. Why isn't Balaam showing any hint of shock or surprise that an animal he's presumably owned for quite some time is now suddenly talking to him? Do we presume that due to his lack of surprise that perhaps he's spoken with his donkey before? Anyways, the donkey asks an unshaken Balaam what she did to deserve getting beaten three times. Balaam gives a puzzling answer stating that he felt that he was being mocked by the donkey's disobedience, while adding that if he had a sword on him, he would have slain the donkey for this apparent "mockery". The donkey points out that she has never behaved like this or deliberately disobeyed her master in the past, to which Balaam concedes is true. At this point, God "opens the eyes" of Balaam allowing him to see the angel armed with a sword - as apparently we're left to surmise that only the donkey was able to see the angel previously. The angel turns the tables on Balaam and asks Balaam why he had beaten his donkey three times. Another bothersome contradiction within this story arises when we are faced with the angel condemning Balaam for beating his donkey. God has previously condoned beating slaves both in the story of Sarah beating a pregnant Hagar, as well as Exodus 21:20-21 allowing for slaves to be beaten - as long as they don't die within one or two days - as they are considered property. By all accounts, Balaam's donkey should be considered his property as well, so God's angel should have no problem with Balaam beating his donkey for disobedience either. Personally, I actually agree with the angel here, that Balaam's actions of beating a defenseless animal were actually "perverse" and deplorable, but again, this isn't consistent with God's accepting view of beating human slaves, who are deemed property to their masters, the same as an animal. Anyways, again the angel states that he would have slain Balaam with his sword because he found Balaam's actions "perverse", which basically gives Balaam a taste of his own medicine - threatening Balaam's life, the same as he had threatened the donkey's. Balaam sees the error of his ways, and admits to having "sinned", rationalizing that he had done so because he was unaware of the angel's presence. He then tells the angel that he will turn around and go back home if he has displeased the angel that much. The angel instead tells him to continue on his journey, but to only say what he is told to say by God. Meanwhile, upon hearing of Balaam's impending arrival, King Balak goes out to meet Balaam on the outskirts of Moab. When Balaam arrives, King Balak admonishes Balaam's hesitation and delay. Balaam responds by stating that although he has agreed to come, that he has no power to say anything except what God has told him to speak. The king then sacrifices some oxen and sheep, giving the animal remains to Balaam and the messengers who accompanied him. The next morning, the king takes Balaam up to the top of Mount Baal, where the people of Israel could be seen spread out before them.